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daymeus - in this one, i'm dead lyrics

[intro: daymeus]

that chair, from beneath, i just kick it

[verse 1: daymeus]

i’ve gone and done it
i didn’t think that i’d follow through, i didn’t
this can’t be f-ckin’ happening
i wanted to be free, i mean, i guess, yeah
i do look quite at peace
but i’m thinkin’ regret gonna kick in, jeez
i should of seen this comin’, oh f-ck me
you had to seen this comin’
you’ve been f-ckin’ listening, yes, you
you heard the rest, the me, depressed
you voyeur, the spoken, hopeless, jests, finessed
i’m more of the blame, i guess, when i think about it (oof)
i’m sorry
i’m feelin heat, is this h-ll?
yeah, maybe i deserve this, i know well
but f-ck, they could turn down the furnace
i’m here, sh-t, clearly i earned it
my sternum is burnin’, i’m sweating
heavy, this is, to reflect
you shouldn’t see this, you could care less, huh?
you’ve lost respect for these, i see, friend
i’m in the deep end, you don’t dive
alive you are and uh
a pretty good grasp on just why i’m down low
religion, i deny, no church, i curse
inflict hurt and rely on lies to subside desires
i’m selfish, could use a beverage
wanna be s-xin’ the next girl
i l-st for crowds like the hex girls
blatantly shut-eyed to rules
like that period of time in school when i stole heaps
and creeped out the house
with my friends with sheets over pillows, ha
to wreck sh-t in the neighborhood
neighbors detested our bull sh-t
d-ckish antics and how we never got caught (why?)
cause we’re just too smart, clearly
guess i’m a bad boy, forgive me, i live recklessly
my life’s heinous—sh-t

i’m not even alive anymore
mom, dad, maygan, connor
i just f-ckin’ left them
f-ck

you f-ckin’ knew didn’t you, mute?
i opened up to you, you heard all the warnings signs
but you’d rather be entertained
by me pourin’ all of my brain out, i’m nothing now
see, i won’t ever write again
songs or notes, lyrics, or books
no more jokes, i can’t provoke folks
i’ll never travel the globe
i’ll never know what it’s like to be a father
to have me a daughter or son
i’m in a slumber i won’t wake from
i don’t even know if anyone’s listening when i talk
some poor f-ck will find me
cops will phone my fam, they’ll all be crying
you feeling guilty yet, listening?
you sorta did this to me
now, there will be a funeral people attend and that’ll be the end
i’ll turn into an anecdote, somebody somebody use to know
he died, a rope, took his own life
a long time ago, d-mn

[chorus: daymeus]

i see me fallin’ slowly
i taste that bitter poison
i feel it coming to an end, still i hear
you don’t really miss home, these are open seems
fall in love with those tears, leave it, let them bleed
blurred in all of these lies, is it them or me?
still i hear this

nanananana na nananana na
nanananana na nananana na
nanananana na nananana na
nana nana na

[skit]

richard: will you sit down emma, you’re makin’ me nervous

emma: richard, shut up. i literally only brought you so you couldn’t tell mom i left you home alone

richard: i’m 16, i don’t need a f-cking babysitter. and i came on my own free will

emma: oh my god. jared, are you finished yet? this house—this room freaking gives me chills

jared: yeah, babe, just a few more pictures. this sh-t’s gonna look so f-cking dope on my blog

emma: okay, just hurry

richard: you know… my friend from school says daymeus’s family moved out right away cause he started haunting this place. that’s why no one moved in

emma: i swear to god, richard

richard: no, no, no, not like horror movie haunted. i mean, it was his family. but like, they would constantly hear moving around in his room and music would randomly turn on and off

jared: rich, that was probably the most basic ghost story i’ve ever heard in my life

richard: really? that you’ve ever heard?

jared: yeah

richard: that’s pretty bold

jared: i know

emma: i can’t believe it’s been 3 years. i remember seeing him around school when i was a freshman and he was a senior

jared: guys, guys, this is a f-cking rope

richard: oh sh-t

emma: where’d you find that?

jared: that closet door just sorta f-cking creeped open and it was just laying on the ground

richard: you don’t think that’s the rope that he…

emma: guys, this was a mistake. i think we should leave

jared: emma!

richard: what’s happening to her?

jared: i don’t know

richard: emma!

emma: what??

richard: emma!

jared: richard, call your parents

emma: guys, you’re scaring me. guys! h-llo?

[interlude: emma]

what’s happening?
i can see but… i can’t control myself
this doesn’t feel like… me
where am i?
am i dead?

[verse 2: daymeus & emma]

this is so wrong, i know
i feel i’m in control
this darkness, deep inside of me
actions they won’t condone

i feel so cheated
don’t think i was meant to be here tonight
internal bleeding but i don’t think i put up a fight

this is all i’ve wanted
this is all i’ve dreamt

where has my time went?
why am i saying these…

[chorus: emma & daymeus]

nanananana na nananana na
nanananana na nananana na
nanananana na nananana na
nana nana na

nanananana na nananana na
nanananana na nananana na
nanananana na—(shh)

- daymeus lyrics

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