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dead milkmen - when i get to heaven lyrics

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if i go to heaven it’ll probably be a slum
and all the pretty angels just might be packing guns
and if i see st. peter will he hit me up for cash
will i find the road to jesus or just lose him in the trash

the sh-ggs were right
you’re never going to please anybody
not in this world

if i go to h-ll i might find it very dull
like an amway convention or an endless shopping mall
when all the innocent demons want to poke me with a fork
or just put me in a taxi and send me to new york

scientists proved it years ago
the sh-ggs were much better than the beatles

maybe i’ll return as an iguana
and lie upon a beach down in the bahamas

although ignored in their day
the sh-ggs are now recognised as the geniuses they were

i just wanna know what happens when you die
do you walk down in a hole or float up to the sky
is it just a waste of water, when your widow cries?

oh don’t tell me you’ve never heard of the sh-ggs?

if the atheists are right then i have no need to worry
for there is no great being whose favour i must curry
and i’ll be going nowhere once they lay me in the earth
so why waste a sunday by going to church?

if you really wanted to
you could run out right now and buy a sh-ggs record

if the atheists are wrong then i’ve got a bill that’s due
so should i be a christian or a moslem or a jew
should i spend all day just praying on my knees
and searching through the world for a deity to please

a sh-ggs record would be a sound investment

if the atheists are right then i have no need to worry
for there is no great being whose favour i must curry

the fat peoples want what the skinny peoples got
the skinny peoples want what the fat peoples got
but all i’ve ever wanted is what the sh-ggs got
dat ding(?) and my pal, foot foot

- dead milkmen lyrics

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