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deadsoon - i swear that i'm trying lyrics

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f-ck this sh-t
i just wanna k!ll myself
i dont feel like i’m alive
and i don’t care about my health
everything you said
stuck inside my head
makes me think i’ll be okay
one day
but i know thats not the truth
i know i’ll be this way forever
and i do not care
i don’t care
as long as you are here
i’ll keep on trying
i swear that i’m trying now

isolate myself
then wonder why i hate myself
why can’t i be happy
i don’t feel like this is working out
but i can’t be happy
no, my brain doesn’t work like that
i’ll just k!ll the pain with smoke
i hate myself
i’m such a mess
what’s the point of even trying
spend most of these late nights crying
say i’m okay
but i’m lying
i don’t think you understand me
my whole life just feels so empty
you don’t know a thing about me
say i should be happy
i wish i could
but i’m stuck
i swear she’ll hate me in the end

f-ck this sh-t
i just wanna k!ll myself
i dont feel like i’m alive
and i don’t care about my health
everything you said
stuck inside my head
makes me think i’ll be okay
one day
but i know thats not the truth
i know i’ll be this way forever
and i do not care
i don’t care
as long as you are here
i’ll keep on trying
i swear that i’m trying now



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