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debbie gravitte & mario cantone - he and she lyrics

[luce]
i was i
you were you
and now we’re only we
we are one
who were two
or we had better be

[dromio of syracuse]
“i now pr+nounce you man and wife”
are magic words like “open sesame”

[luce]
but though they made you mine for life
they also made you think much less of me

[dromio of syracuse]
it only shows how little you know of it

[luce]
i know a pair who made quite a go of it

he was a man who was very fond of women
she was a girl who was very fond of men
she had a taste for both corpulent and slim men
hе wouldn’t look at a lady under ten
she wеnt abroad just to find a man to marry
he went abroad just to find himself a wife
she didn’t want any tom or d+ck or harry
he sought a mate who’d be true to him for life
she fell in love with the angle of his eyebrow
he fell in love with the dimple on her knee
and when they wed
he went around with other women
and she went with other men
and that is he and she!

[dromio of syracuse]
he always said, “i would like to have a daughter”
she always said, “i would like to have a son”
she took to kids like a duckling takes to water
he always thought having babies would be fun
he told her this on the very day he met her
she said, “the wish is the father to the sport”
he bought a house, in the nursery he set her
she helped the stork make his annual report
he won renown as the father of a squadron
she won awards for her prolificacy
and just because
and just because they loved their children
they got married after all
and that is he and she!

she was so pure as the snow before it’s driven

[luce]
he never smoked and he never touched a drop
[dromio of syracuse]
when she said “boo” she would ask to be forgiven

[luce]
when he would swim, he would always wear the top

[dromio of syracuse]
she wore no rouge though she had a bad complexion

[luce]
he always prayed every time he went to bed

[dromio of syracuse]
she was so kind that she hated vivisection

[luce]
he loved his ma and he swore he’d never wed

[dromio of syracuse]
she was so chaste that it made her very nervous

[luce]
he loved to go to the vicarage for tea

[luce & dromio of syracuse]
and when they died
and when they died and went to heaven
all the angels moved to h+ll
and that is he and she!

- debbie gravitte mario cantone lyrics

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