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deborah healy - popcorn / vernon lyrics

[verse 1]
i was walking through central park, prepping for my world tour
when a man came up behind me and called me a nasty wh-r-
i thought he was homeless, so i maced him
and then i kicked him in his fat nuts again and again and again
when i calmed down, i looked down and saw a hot daddy wearing a uniform
i helped him up and my p-ssy started to get warm
he told me his name was vernon, which is ugly, but it’s whatever

[pre-chorus]
i usually don’t go for men with a lower pay grade than me
but i can tell your d-ck is big and it makes me want to pee
oh sh-t, i think i did pee
hang on, just listen to the chorus i’ll be right back

[chorus]
why pop that popcorn when you can pop my p-ssy?
stick your salami inside, my insides are warm and mushy
it’s not a yeast infection, i swear
i queefed and it dispersed into the air

[post-chorus]
popcorn
popcorn
popcorn
popcorn
popcorn
popcorn
popcorn
popcorn

[verse 2]
i lead vernon back to my tour bus
i was ready to give him a slice of this floppy, juicy puss
i lit some candles and put on my lacy c-m-encrusted panties
but as i was getting ready, i realized my condoms had been stolen by some vigilantes

[pre-chorus]
i decided it didn’t matter; i could always get an abortion
i was blinded by s-xual distortion
i wanted that d-ck like a granny wants b-tterscotch
so i got on my knees in front of his crotch

[bridge: deborah healy and vernon]
hungrily, i unb-ttoned his pants and ripped them down
i was ready to go to pound town
his musk was equivalent to a colonel
but to my surprise, his c-ck was the size of a popcorn kernel
i was so distraught i backed up and knocked over a candle
the entire van lit up in flames when i reached the handle
deborah, please help me!
no, f-ggot

[chorus]
why pop that popcorn when you can pop my p-ssy?
stick your salami inside, my insides are warm and mushy
it’s not a yeast infection, i swear
i queefed and it dispersed into the air
you make me feel so high
but last time i did c-ke, my daughter died
i wish i could remember her name
but all i can think about is d-ck, and how it came
maybe if vernon stanned deborah healy he wouldn’t have died
but his d-ck was smaller than his pride
i moan like a foghorn, make me popcorn
(popcorn, popcorn)

- deborah healy lyrics

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