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dempseyrollboy - i shoulda been there... lyrics

i shoulda been there… lyrics
[chorus]
she watched me ruin myself
i wasn’t there when she needed me most
i couldn’t shake off my habits, i tried to find balance
instead, i found new ways to cope
drug after drug, going more and more numb
’til i couldn’t feel love, ’til i didn’t have hope
she left a note in the condo, it said she was finished
i guess that was murder she wrote
and she ain’t around anymore
life ain’t the same anymore
when i try to reach out, i never hеar back
i can’t stand that i’m being ignored
i wish things werе different
i wish that i gave her a reason to trust me before
but i wasn’t worth her time anyway
we’re both exhausted, our love ran it’s course

[verse 1]
nothing goes right for me, i f+ck up everything
i’ll be that way ’til i take my last breath
i promise that girl that i’d give her the world
instead, i gave her thousands of reasons to stress
she took my baggage without even knowing it
i dragged her into my mo’f+cking mess
i know there ain’t no controlling it, just get it over with
turn off the thoughts in my head
f+ck all this godd+mn anxiety
f+ck all these feelings that i hold inside of me
they caused e problems that caused her to fight with me
since i was young, i’ve been suffering silently
every song is a page in my diary
showcasing sadness, a whole ‘nother side of me
things i don’t share with the rest of society
i let her in, she invaded my privacy
loyalty’s so hard to come by
i found it and i let it slip through my fingers
i know that i’ll always regret all those days that i wasted
cuz pain doesn’t end, it just lingers
i spent every second i have reminiscing on us
i miss all of her beautiful features
i’m still so surprised she was mine for a time
i’m a loser, a loner, an underachiever
remember when i still didn’t know who i was
when everything seemed like it wasn’t enough
back then, it wasn’t nothing more than fun
back then, it wasn’t nothing more than l+st
then it turned into discussions ‘bout trust
then it became something bigger than us
she couldn’t stay, she decided to run
but i don’t blame her cause i’m hard to love
i’m hard to love, yeah i’m hard to love
she can’t accept that i actually changed
i can’t accept that she’s actually done
[chorus]
she watched me ruin myself
i wasn’t there when she needed me most
i couldn’t shake off my habits, i tried to find balance
instead, i found new ways to cope
drug after drug, going more and more numb
’til i couldn’t feel love, ’til i didn’t have hope
she left a note in the condo, it said she was finished
i guess that was murder she wrote
and she ain’t around anymore
life ain’t the same anymore
when i try to reach out, i never hear back
i can’t stand that i’m being ignored
i wish things were different
i wish that i gave her a reason to trust me before
but i wasn’t worth her time anyway
we’re both exhausted, our love ran it’s course

- dempseyrollboy lyrics

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