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dempseyrollboy - lonely nights lyrics

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i been feelin’ frozen
i got used to lonely nights
a broken sinner
living under heavens ghostly lights
excuse me if i do me but this is my only life
b-tch i spit religiously
the booth’s a holy sight

under a blanket of stress
i got so much on my mind
i’m a mess
i don’t pretend to be f-ckin’ depressed
it’s not an act it’s as bad as it gets
wish it was something i couldn’t express
suicide’s prowlin’
and i feel like i’m next
went through some sh-t that i couldn’t project
all the emotions are feelin’ suppressed

i’m livin’ a lie
been dressed in disguise
so much that i don’t know who i really am
the secrets and things i been hidin’ for real
like almost as much as the city has
i makin’ a name for myself
but what good is it if i am dead
and i’m really sad?
my spirit been missin’ the devil
then took it and ever since then
i been feelin’ bad

mistaken for something i’m not
i’m just a loser ya’ll must have forgot
my heart is beating i hope it don’t pop
f-ck everybody that wants it to stop
i been so down i don’t know what to say
so i just smoke all these feelings away
i been so busy just tryna’ get paid
figured i might as well die with some bank

b-tch i been feigning to roll up the dank
f-ck i been feigning to pull up a drank’
livin’ in h-ll so i try to escape
i need a reason to cope with the pain
all of my problems done f-cked up my brain
losing my mind
sh-t i might be insane
it’s like my freedoms were wrapped up in chains
but ya’ll don’t know so lemme’ explain

simply a victim since i was created
i hate it man dammit just look whatchu’ did to me
you banished and labelled me crazy
but guess what
the last thing i want is your sympathy
if i am reborn in this world then
i promise that i will do everything differently
if heaven and h-ll turn out to be real
then i will be burnin’ up instantly

i’m on the brink of insanity
i been a part of too many calamities
f-ck everybody
f-ck all of humanity
i wanna live in a different reality
one like a fantasy
leave out the agony tragedy savagery
actually leave it all in
we love the sin
evil within
everyone has it i seen what it is

friends turn to enemies
hidden ident-ties
f-ck all the snakes in my life
ya’ll are dead to me
lost in my thoughts
i’ve been losing it mentally
i’m just a hollow collection of memories

i’m nothin’ special just wandering energy
dempsy
my purpose is penning these elegy’s
someone worth lovin’
is somethin’ i’ll never be
sadness and sorrow
no joy and serenity

constantly questioning my own existence
i said i’m finished but n-body listens
i could let go but it won’t make a difference
when it’s all over i’m not gonna miss it
my soul is broken it’s too late to fix it
i never fit in i feel like a misfit
n-body came when i needed -ssistance
now i got too many drugs in my system

they look at me funny
but f-ck it i’m crazy
keep turnin’ they backs on me
doing 180’s
so f-ck everybody it’s too late to save me
i hate my reflection but how could you blame me
i follow a shadow
that’s driven to take me way down to the bottom where they would embrace me
a place where they wouldn’t all judge me and hate me
this world that i live in
it f-ckin’ betrayed me

lonely nights
i hope i die
the sun won’t shine again
this time when i close my eyes
they won’t open wide again
i feel trapped inside this body
and this artificial skin
i been sufferin’ so long
i’m just a f-ck up
i’m convinced

- dempseyrollboy lyrics

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