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distant (nld) - nothing left to hate lyrics

[intro]
i never needed help
i needed someone to watch me fall

[refrain]
how many times did i build myself out of nothing just to tear it all down again?
how many promises did i stitch into my own skin just to rip them out when no one stayed?
every mirror i broke, every door i slammed, every fist i threw at the air

[verse 1]
i was screaming for someone to make it stop
but i knew it had to be me
and it never was
i saw the cracks form
i watched the floor give out
i was the first to leave myself behind

[chorus]
nothing left to patch
nothing left to hate but me
nothing left to patch
nothing left to hate but me

[verse 2]
i filled every empty sp+ce with noise, with blood
and every time i said “i’m fine”
it felt more like a loaded gun than a lifeline
i ran my hands through the ashes of what i could’ve been
crushed every second chance like it owed me something
i was supposed to be better
but i can’t stay human long enough to heal
[refrain]
how many times did i build myself out of nothing just to tear it all down again?
how many promises did i stitch into my own skin just to rip them out when no one stayed?
every mirror i broke, every door i slammed, every fist i threw at the air

[breakdown]
i carry every version of myself that failed
i drag them behind me like a f+cking chain
crumble where i stand
bury me in the walls i built
i was the storm
i was the silence after
i was everything i said i’d never be
i was everything i said i’d never be
and i can’t even tell
i can’t even tell the difference anymore

- distant nld lyrics

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