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doug anthony allstars - sailors arms lyrics

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way-ay-ay-ay
(a-way-a-way-a-w-ng-dang-dang-dang)

i met her at the sailor arms, a bar down by the docks
full of prost-tutes and deviants and fellas wearing frocks
went there to drown my sorrow, my misery and pain
with fourteen multicoloured pills and a pint of heavy ale (heavy ale)

i saw this girl across the way who was smiling through the wine
so i begged her, “come on over, come on over, spend some time”
and i spilled my life before her and she seemed to understand
although she was a girl we were talking man to man (man to man)

for love is where you find it, wherever that may be
for me it was in the sailors arms at twenty-five past three
there’s something strange about her i can’t put my finger on
but i wanna tell the world that she’s the one (she’s the one)
i wanna tell the world that she’s the one

(w-ng-w-ng-w-ng)

she strolled up to the toilets, she strolled into the gents
i asked her why she did it, why she’d gone to pay the rent
we arm-wrestled and i lost, she beat me with a spike
told me seedy jokes that were quite unladylike (ladylike)

it was four in the morning and through the smoky haze
i could’ve been mistaken, but she needed to shave (to shave)

for love is where you find it, wherever that may be
for me it was in the sailors arms with a better man than me
her husky voice seduced me, my heart was in a mess
i sat upon her knee as something twitched beneath her dress
there’s something more than knees beneath her dress

you’ve got nice eyes, says i (oh sir, i am surprised!)
what large hands i said (all the better to touch you with)
god, you arms look strong (a woman’s work is never done)
your legs are quite hirsute (aren’t you the saucy one!)

(hey!) way-ay-ay-ay
(way-a-way-a-w-ng-dang and a w-ng-dang-dang-dang-dang)

i was feeling less than stable when she said her name was ken (ken?)
well if i had suspicions, lord i should’ve had ’em then (then?)
she cried as she told me how she was so confused
one more visit to the doctor she’d have nothing left to lose (toulouse-lautrec)

i ran my fingers through her wig, she lightly stroked my hair
she said she was a man and i—

[tim spoken: whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! she said she was a man? a man called ken? bull-tw-ng!]

[paul spoken: lots of men are called ken]

[richard spoken: so what did you say, paul?]

i told her i don’t care (he doesn’t care! he doesn’t care!)
for love is where you find it wherever that may be
for me it was in a hopper bin with my trousers ’round my knees
there’s something strange about her i just put my finger on

[paul spoken: oh, by jesus. feel that, just above the perineum there. there’s a bit of plastic surgery, isn’t it? get your filthy fingers away from it, richard!]

and i want to tell the world that she’s the one (he’s the one)
i want to tell the world that it’s the one!

[paul spoken: [?] but, why? why?]

- doug anthony allstars lyrics

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