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dropoutofficial - fall apart lyrics

chorus (lockhome):
i just can’t let you go
i just can’t let you go again
i fall apart when i think of you
i can’t do this alone
i can’t do this alone again
i fall apart when i think of you
when i think of you
when i think of you
i fall apart when i think of you

verse 1 (dropout):
i need someone to get me out of my head
i keep having thoughts, wishin i was dead
i want to rest but i can’t go to bed
prayed to god, i cannot hear what he said

this anxiety won’t let me breathe
and all these memories won’t let me sleep

my mind is flooded in a dungeon, where’s the ark
the sky’s the summit, climbed above it, how’d it get so dark
am i in h-ll? fell in love, now i have a broken heart
i wish i could rewind, go back in time and find the start

shaking, breaking from the stress and pressure
i used to think that peace would last forever
no pain, no gain but when does pain turn into pleasure
wrote to god, don’t think he got the letter

stuck inside of my mind, i need to find
hope, can you show me a sign

stuck inside this cloudy haze
doubted any sign of grace
i need to find a place
where there’s only peace and i don’t need to be afraid
there’s no finish line, my mind loves to race
the climate changed and time erased

chorus (lockhome):
i just can’t let you go
i just can’t let you go again
i fall apart when i think of you
i can’t do this alone
i can’t do this alone again
i fall apart when i think of you

verse 2 (dropout):
every bit of love i ever felt (when i think of you)
i try not to dwell, i tell myself (when i think of you )
(when i think of you)

my existence has a purpose (when i think you)
i know it isn’t perfect (when i think of you)
life has its ups and downs but now i can’t see the surface (when i think of you)
so i ask the universe when does hurt turn into bliss (i fall apart when i think of you)

time p-sses too quickly
gave but before i could thank it stripped me
took it all away and tripped me
now i’m lookin at my grave sayin rip me

my heart aches, i need a surgeon to determine if it’s a break
is it a curse to endure this amount of pain
drowning like i’m down in the drain
bitter, i quiver from the decisions i made

underneath, looking up, i try to reach
held down, h-llbound is this defeat
nightmares scared away my dreams
tried to cross but i cannot part the sea

i can’t help but fall apart, i’ve given all my heart
spend my nights counting fallen stars
i don’t even know where to start
tearin’ my hair out ’cause i think that it’s all my fault
scared, ’cause i know i’m slowly losin’ my resolve
going through harsh withdrawal, every day i just sit here
barely able to crawl, crying my eyes out in bathroom stalls
wondering where the h-ll this went wrong
wandering halls, where we used to walk

verse 3 (dropout):
pick up the mouldy chalk, where we used to sit and draw
these four marvellous walls, now nothing but thralls
a catalyst of so many negative emotions
where i’ve used up so much of my devotion
don’t want to relive the past, or think of the notion
but in my heart, i’m hopin’, that maybe one day i will be free of this pesterin’ poison
tryna drain out the noise, and it’s only left me slowly frozen

attending appointments that do nothing but leave me broken
feelin’ h-llbound, like i was chosen to be thrown into a never-ending ocean
waves hurlin’ me around causin’ unbearable motion, slowly degrading my only hopes
dangling by the thread of a mangled rope, quickly breaking
i’m forsaken, time is the thing i’m always good at wasting
my dreams i’m tryna chase, but i feel like i’ll never be brave
but knowing who i am, i’ll never satisfy that craving

- dropoutofficial lyrics

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