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einbaer - i don't know lyrics

i don’t know what i even want
i don’t know why i’m so withdrawn
i don’t know what i’m working on
i don’t know where myself has gone
i lost all of my special bonds
when’s the last time that i’ve felt fond?
i can’t think of a fair response
overwhelmed trying to resond
when is therapy ever done?
i remember when it begun
did the psychiatrics a ton
nothing’s helping in the long run
repetition goes on and on
i can’t wait till the end of dawn
all my rants end up way too long
i can’t wait till the end of song

i don’t know what more i can say
i can’t make a thing go my way
tell me what’s the point tryna stay
if i go on you’ll go away
why’s my life a dramatic play?
what’s the reason i stopped to pray?
why did young me get used to blades?
i think someday i might just break
all the joy in my life decays
i lost count on my thrown out days
how i wish it was just a phase
how i wish i could just rephrase
all the time i’m being persuade
am i in control of my fate?
all the help & treatments i’ve payed
i can’t think, i can’t contemplate
i don’t know how much more i’ve got
what is good for me, what is not?
i need help right now on the spot
tried myself but i overthought
i got plenty options, a lot
so much i forgot my own plot
always failing to shoot my shot
guess i’ll go to my bed and rot
everything negative is mine
no intend, yet i amplify
never stop to pretend it’s fine
not on purpose or justified
i know i shouldn’t stop to try
but i can’t really stop to cry
i know i shouldn’t wish to die
think of all the good things denied

- einbaer lyrics

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