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element m - didn't seem to lyrics

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[verse:]
people think i’m so good i can probably talk to angels
and if i’m given two choices, i’ll do what a saint will
what they don’t see is the people that i’ve failed and the trust i lost, i must have caused some pain
still i don’t change, like a mad man who thinks he has gone sane
already the age where i’m paying for my phone bills
who would’ve thought that time will fly by like a sly missile
but i’m growing still
and life happens
people in passing come and teach me chapters that i didn’t even ask for
and other times, the ghosts of past will come and close the gaps, it’s like i’m bros with casper
i’m supposed to master the art of living but look i tore my canvas
and my narcissism will make you throw your hands up
i’m far too different to fit in a horde of randoms but my heart is missing it, so it’s throwing tantrums
largest ego in every room that i step in
’cause i’m dark and evil on every tune that i’m wrecking
but a part of me that is a boon, is a blessing, makes it hard to breathe, becomes the tomb that i rest in
chest feels strange like i’m in a grave danger
my brain waves in the same range as a major panic attack
and i can even find an eraser to erase all the memories
i don’t wanna pay for my deeds in the past, so i pray for mercy
’cause if decency is that then i’m made so dirty
and i’m full of sh+t, so mummify me firmly
and, please, for the wraps, toilet paper for me
here’s why i try not to lie, it’s ’cause a lie is all that i feel like
the more i try not to think about it, the more i know it’s my real life
past traumas in black formals coming back for me, i didn’t ask for them
and that’s the coffin dance gang for me
so don’t ask me to act normal
life’s moving, my gears shifting
bright moments and tears dripping
i’m a nice human till my fears kick in
i’ve tried doing some years fixing
i’m a jerk, evil when i sink deeper
i’ve hurt some people that i didn’t mean to
i’m not gangsta or mark manson
i gave a f+ck but i didn’t seem to



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