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epic rap batles of history - bill cipher vs bill clinton lyrics

[intro: the announcer and bill cipher]
epic rap+ [?] batles of history
yours truly+ oh come on mr. jay, didn’t monika use this one already?
eh, whatever, i guess you might begin!
i said begin

[verse 1: bill clinton]
the main politician of the usa will chop you like some pine trees
although i didn’t play a central role in the country ’til the 90s
you’ll turn into a blind eye, like you left your parents, playing a harp
looking backwards, this is more pathetic than your bout with magikarp
you know lots of things but the old switcheroo was enough to leave you dead
you may get inside people’s heads but at least i get more head
so now that we got that out the way your dissеs are no concern
when this bill cyphеr is over i’ll have illuminati losing confirmed

[verse 2: bill cipher]
you’re 78 and wrinkly, i’m over millions and clean so let me brag
when i’m ducking you, it’s old man yaoi with an age gap tag
i guess lead does cause poisoning when you decided to cross me
we’re not alike regarding women ’cause this bill’s more like cosby (ooh!)
and i know what i said about martha, it made my plan fall through
but to refuse my constitution? just look at where that got you
and your rap was pretty wack so let’s see, how about this?
let me use your body and then you’ll actually know how to diss
[verse 3: bill clinton and bill cipher]
i’d invite you to my country ’cause now i support cxddlqp
but i have your historical records, you crushed your people like maggots
and i’m not like those kids you mess with, so no, we don’t have a deal!
how’d you think you’d win this batle when you’re not even+ i’m real!

[verse 4: bill cipher]
though explaining how it works would be quite a lot of trouble
to put it basically, i’m not just inside the pages of a novel
now if i say that your victory is real then what this spitter means
is that i’m mixing fiction and reality harder than twitter teens

[verse 5: bill clinton]
i tried to read your book, it was so bad i threw it away!
alt history is not mind boggling despite what youtubers say
you refused to go to therapy and you can’t even go to h+ll
you’re getting ate up like nachos when dipper invited me to taco bell
i love the coloreds and the queers, solved many of their conundrums
don’t ask mr. cipher what he was doing in the 1700s
you just got played like the saxophone when i perform
and winning us the civil war doesn’t mean you’ve been reformed

[verse 6: bill cipher]
this ain’t 3 letters back, you’re actually spitting bs
my show was so awesome it ran for 3 whole seasons!
oh! and i gotta ask, how is this guy a bill when his real name is william?
they literally put me in the 1 dollar bill so now you know who i really am!
and it meant something! but then came inflation and it truly bothers
me that thanks to you it’s worth next to nothing, so just buy crypto, suckers!
and ultimately despite all the malarkey you preached
you will just go down as the second president to get impeached
[outro: bill cipher]
who won?
who’s next?
i decide of course!
on.. epic rap+ uh.. why do all the presidents look the same in this thing?
is it.. bay+tles or batles of history

- epic rap batles of history lyrics

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