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epic rap batles of history - hello neighbor vs ned flanders lyrics

[intro]
epic rap batles of history!
theodore peterson
vs
ned flanders
begin!

[verse 1: theodore peterson]
you must be crazy if you’re stepping to the neighbor
i’m the baddest motherf+cker, check the papers
if you ever think of stepping one foot in my place
i will shoot you in both legs and then in the face
over the years it seems that your ratings have tanked
you act fake; it’s clear you’re used to getting your ass spanked
with that face and tragic life and you still don’t lack faith
now i’ll take this battle like your little tv tray
i’ll break through your facade, let the real truth provoke
your pious little world’s about to go up in smoke
you can hide behind your mustache, but i can still see your scars
i’ve faced the devil, ned, and you’re nowhere up to par

[verse 2: ned flanders]
how+diddly+ho, neighbor, i see your pain
but there’s more to life than living in vain
i guess i have to roll the dice again just to avoid this
i think theodore is going to enjoy this
you should leave my children out of your statements
your son k!lled your daughter; now he’s locked in your bas+m+nt
just face it, the wrath of god; you’ll never escape it
your game lacked any substance, took a month to replace it
that rap verse had nothing at all
nothing at all. nothing at all!
one look at your past, seems you’re one of satan’s saviors
i’d invite you to my house but you ain’t a good neighbor
[verse 3: theodore peterson]
you think you’re clean, ned? just one glass of liquor

this tramp champ thought he could bounce back
but i’ll make him see jesus again with a big zap
i’m the crow in the shadows with a messed up story, man
closing in on you like your leftorium
once a family man whose children were well off
but 30 seasons in; like your poor wife, you fell off!

[verse 4: ned flanders]
oh…
woah there, ned diddly diddly diddly+
ah h+ll, enough with your diddly ding dong cr+p
you can’t do anything right despite your expertise in craft
you just rot your life away setting your house with traps
maybe spend that time constructing an actual good rap
phew, calm down ned+diddly, don’t let this moron get you upset
truth be told, you’re the worst human being i’ve ever met
as i’ve seen, both your games got some backlash
and just like your wife, it seems you’ve ended in a crash

[outro: the announcer and the announcer’s neighbor]
who won?
who’s next?
you decide!
epic+ +door knocks+
dude… it’s 4am…
i+i’m sorry!
rap batles of history…
shut the f+ck up!

- epic rap batles of history lyrics

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