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epic rap battles of cartoons - squidward's suicide vs dead bart 2 lyrics

[intro]
epic rap battles of cartoons
squidward suicide
vs
dead bart
2
begin

[verse 1: squidward’s suicide]
let’s go bart, squidward is ready to shine!
me battling you twice will be a waste of my time
you’re not original, that’s why you’re not going first
your creepypasta lacked scariness, it’s got to be the worst
when my title card comes on the screen, you know you’re doomed
you can’t diss me, you’re just homer’s body with your head glued on
you’ll be scared once i show you the 5 dead kids again
i’m gonna blow you up with disses, like how i blow on my clarinet!

[verse 2: dead bart]
screw your clarinet playing, read my story and you’ll go insane
you blow more notes than what you did to your brain
i’ll always be k!llin, you’ll be dead chillin, i’ll be the villain
you’ve never stop me squidface, in the end you’re grilling
like a krabby patty, don’t stare at me, why don’t you die quiet!
in the end of this, you’ll end like the credits, dead silent
your story caused fears? well guess what, i don’t give a f+ck
don’t cry now squidward, come on, give me a hug
[verse 3: squidward’s suicide]
ahh! open your f+cking eyes, your pasta sucks
your family won’t care when i blow your brains out and your guts
you wanna make fun of me k!lling myself, ahhh! i knew it!
i dare you to leave this battle and never come back, just do it!
there’s no time for goodbye bart, so i’ll just say h+llo
you’re even sick of self; that’s why your skin is so yellow
you could never feel the pain i do, i’m gonna k!ll myself
it’s time to die! see you again in h+ll…

[verse 4: dead bart]
h+ll? ha! as if! when you blow your brains, i’ll celebrate
cause it’s clear to see your death came as predicted on this grave!
i’m a true face of horror, don’t need stretches or blurrings
your story is the most hated, while mine is still adoring
this little squid being scary? now that’s just plain insane!
you think showing dead kids is okay? this sh+t ain’t a f+cking game!
see these names on my tombstone? you’re next on my list!
get ready mr. squid, cause it’s time to get violent!

[verse 5: spongebob’s bootleg and spongecry.avi]
i’m ready, i’m ready! to kick you two sh+ttypastas
i’ll pop like how i pop my bubbles to stop this drama
frame by frame, you two are tame compared to the horrors i got, b+tch
squidward, you’ll be blood+shot in the face, with my rhymes that can twitch
you’ll be dumped in the trash can; where those teens found me
how can you beat this bootleg? i’m the real meaning of scary
i’ll make you all commit suicide with my staticy and buzzing rhymes
now time to bring in the real horror: spongecry.avi!
oh, you wanna be scared? then watch this scary .avi
don’t be mean to me, you’ll make spongebob cry
once you see my episode, it’ll leave your asses quivering!
when i’m done, you all will end up like gary, dead and rotting!
i’ll rip you all up into chunks just like my red chair
it’s best you all run away now, or you’ll be in for a scare!
squidward, stop with your stupid sh+t and just end your life already
before i k!ll you all off, i just want you to know, this one timed action will be badly
[verse 6: max, ruby, and both (max & ruby 004)]
we’ll make you feel like your heart is in your throat once you see us
it’s such a shame that we need to k!ll you, so just hush
we made a little girl scream and almost made her heart give out
tonight, we’ll show you what scary is all about
we’re gonna leave you dead like our mommy and daddy
since all your creepypastas are just stupid tragedies
you’re all gonna be tortured and deceased
you don’t think we’re scary? well death is our only release!

[verse 7: mr. bear (1999)]
this bear is aware that i’m gonna scare these “bone chillers”
i’ll take you to my cellar and show you who’s the better k!ller
i’m gonna eat your souls on this episode of soup and spoon
my rap flow is like scissors, it’s very dangerous for you
my name is mr. bear, bringing more fear than freddy
i’m coming down these bas+m+nt stairs, you better be ready
i’m hiding in these woods in canada, you’re gonna get scared
‘cause 1999 is the year where you go off the air

[verse 8: gumball, darwin, and both (the grieving)]
welcome to my amazing world, hope you’re all in for a treat
we’ll be making you cry, once you taste your bl++dy defeats!
cut out all your guts, and hang them on these trees!
in the end, you’ll be found dead, just like anais!
max and ruby, you were only made cause you were desperate for fame
suicidal, depression, you’re all the same!
mr. bear, you’re not scary, so why even bother?
you all will be shot in the face just like sarah’s brother!
[verse 9: ed, edd, eddy, and all (ed edd n eddy lost episode)]
once you see our episode, you’ll be the true chicken
i’ll eat your souls like it’s b+ttered toast, to make the audience sickened
we’ll swallow your heads like johnny, beat your asses up like jimmy
you’ll be needing a dentist because it’s about to get gory!
you dorks are gonna p+ss yourselves, when you step up to the eds
once you take a look at this episode, it’ll lead you to your ends!
c’mon guys, let’s put an end to these creeps!
we’ll have you laying on eddy’s floor, and let you have a good night sleep!

[verse 10: doug’s real life]
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[verse 11: stick stickly]
it’s stick stickly, ripping through this battle sickly, you pr+cks
find my website? all you gotta do is cl!ck! i got lost episodes, you’ll find 6
hey kids, wanna play hang stick? i’ll make sure that your necks will get slit
the splinters will hurt, just for a minute, “the winner is revealed”, and you’re not it
do i gotta spell it out for you guys? when “stick gets mad”, you’ll meet your demise
i’ve been tortured and beaten, see the x on my face? no smile, no nose, no sound, no eyes
no lie, i’ll write it in bold, the segments unfold! and truth be told
with the blood on top; it’s time for stick to go, you got what you wanted… the winner is candle… cove?

[verse 12: skin taker and pirate percy (candle cove)]
better grab a candle, ‘cause your future is about to get dark
come a little bit closer, i’ll grind your skin apart
you eds aren’t ready for the type of show we’ll bring
how can you win, when the puppets are pulling the strings?
spongebob, your bootleg is a laughingstock, want this to stop?
i’ll slaughter you and the rest of these pastas, make the boat rock
we’re spitting k!ller disses that will make you all scream
coming out your screen, we’ll now forever haunt your dreams

[verse 13: happy appy]
that’s right kids! appy’s coming back with a rerun
let’s talk about a tragic event, c’mon it’ll be fun!
how about a 3 minute death stare to help you all relax?
when i’m done with my verse, you’ll all have sticks up your ass
how sad, a little apple can get the murders done more quickly
i’ll bring you all to my van, i’ll break you in half, stickly
once my show comes on, you won’t be able to change the channel
all of your networks called, your shows have been cancelled

[verse 14: finn (adventure time: catherine! catherine!)]
what time is it? it’s time to k!ll you all
i’m gonna take your souls like how zim is gonna take your dolls
squidward, your story isn’t good, or should i say mathematical?
bart, my rhymes will make you break, that you will fall
rest in peace, max and ruby, 1999 doesn’t scare me
pirate percy, you arrg dumb, just like happy appy
shmowzow! this is how i’m gonna finish this off
you’ll be screaming catherine! catherine! once you’re f+cked

[verse 15: gregory’s room]
h+llo, my name is gregory, and welcome to my room
i’m just sitting here dissing these freaks, warning their dooms
it’s just the two of us having fun, helping kids with their gloom
appy, you’re more legit than mr. bear’s costume
i’ll throw you in the glorious flames of the fireplace
no one can hear you, no police, no parents
please embrace me, i need love from above
help me, please, i need it, gregory needs love!!!

[verse 16: bl++dy gir]
it’s time to get bl++dy, gir is here to make you all hurt
i’m more useful than you pointless stories that look like dirt
let’s go on an easter egg hunt, you won’t be able to find me
bl++dy h+ll, i could find more scare from stick stickly
don’t even dare step to me, i’ll eat you like a waffle
you’re just disgraces that are just awful, appy, your story is like a novel
how could you say you won, you were turkeys the whole time
you’ve met your doom, and you’ll never ever survive

[verse 17: fluttershy’s lullaby]
you better hush now, quiet now, once i put you to sleep
this gir is nothing, you’ll be next to die as you weep
the crusaders were just the beginning, you’ll soon see
with your piercing screams, you’ll be another gift from rarity
i’m the element of kindness, so there’s no way i can hate
but come with me children, your death bed awaits
you’re too late, you’re as dead as the look in my eye
sweet dreams for your eternal rest, good lulla+bye

[verse 18: axis powers hetalia episode 23.5]
be quiet fluttershy, i’ll have you pass out for real
then i’ll put your organs on sticks to have a good meal
j+pan and germany will drown you, since n0body wants to hear you scream
you’ll be deceased, you freaks will have a better blood scene
than gir popping up in invader zim all the time, i’ll make you fall
n0body ever wanted you to axist in the slightest, not at all
i’ll be staring at the light better than happy appy’s stupid scene
just like me, you’ll be cooked ‘cause your disses were just weak

[verse 19: chowder and mung (dead mung)]
when it comes to lost episodes, every one of you is nothin’
if you dare try to diss me, i’ll throw your asses in the oven
you all are sons of burgers, i’d like to see you all scare me
i’ll bake you and serve you on a dish, these fools will be yummy
all of you will be roasted like mung, you’re next on my menu
cooking fluttershy, gir, and axis in a bowl for some stew
i’ll make you scream like an abused chipmunk, that’s no surprise
are you trying to k!ll me? i’d like to see you try!

[verse 20: timmy’s wish]
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now i wish that you all would just get out of this!

[verse 21: tom and jerry (tom’s bas+m+nt)]
time for some real horror, it’s tom and jerry
are you b+tches ready, ‘cause it’s about to get scary!
take a step into the bas+m+nt, where your corpses will be
we’re gonna get more violent, i’ll be laughing while you weep
we’ll have you suffering at the end of this, leaving you a bunch of bruises
it’s true that we’ll stab your leg and throw you down the stairs, you’re losing
i’ll stab you, then sell you, and i’ll do it all again
we’ve won this battle, don’t you believe it?

[verse 22: sweet apple massacre]
alright, that’s enough, time to show you b+tches up
me lose to you? (nope) you know you’re all “f+cked”
happy appy, you’ll be bucked and squashed, no doubt
i’ll rape and slaughter you all, show you what fear is about
rip out your eyes, so you won’t see your death “cumming”
you’re locked in this cellar, no where for you foals to start running
nopony will ever know, i’ll make sure you stay silent
now i can forever sit in my peace and quiet

[verse 23: angry sylvester]
sylvester is here to abuse this horse, i’m sure
time to tear down these lights, they don’t look good for this verse
don’t make me angry, or i’ll make this whole scene violent
you’re gonna end up like the music of my episode, dead silent
i’ll bang you like a guitar string, and the blood i will taste
i’ll kick your ass to hungarian, where the short takes place
n0body reads your stories, this gory cat will make a mess
this episode ends now, and you won’t be coming up next

[verse 24: gromble, oblina, krumm, and ickis (ahh real monsters: the final scare)]
alright everyone, i have a mission for you all
make the best scare that will make the world want to bawl
we’re filled with mallice, no one is more gory than us
wait oblina, why are you throwing me in front of this bus?!
oblina will make you o+bleeding, everyone will be seeing
stop it! i don’t wanna die! there’s not a single reason!
gromble, i’ve done it, i k!lled them all and brought fear
that was certainly the best scare that i have ever seen in years!

[verse 25: postman pat (return to sender)]
h+llo there, we got a package from this spitting mailman
that can mail mail to many nice people, ’cause i can
but what i’ll be giving to these monsters, it’s full of surprises
once they open it, they’ll be weeping until the sound rises
i’ll static it up, then i’ll be staring at this mail
it’s a true fact that angry sylvester is a huge fail
now let me say something that you’ll be knowing a lot
curiosity k!lled the cat, and postman pat k!lled the pastas

[verse 26: nightmare ned]
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[verse 27: arthur (arthur: lost episode)]
shut up, you all! i’m trying to read!
these lines that i’ve written with the blood of my granny
you don’t want to mess with me, i k!lled them all!
you’ll scream like dw, you don’t have any b+lls
to go up against this moose, i’ll give you a bad bruise
i’ll leave your dead bodies at the sugar bowl, you’ll surely lose
i’ll buster these freaks, and it won’t bother me
you all will end up like my grandma, and i won’t give you recovery!

[verse 28: mordecai and rigby (i can fix this)]
you better run away now, i’m more scary than red mist
f+ck your asses up ‘til you’re dead, with my own fists
we’ll beat you all up, we’re too disgusted to see your faces
c’mon mordecai, it’s time we put these b+tches in their places
you can’t fix this, you f+cking moron! what is wrong with you all?
my rhymes will make everybody want to fal+ +gets shot+
n0body shoots my best friend! if you don’t leave, i’ll have you all severed!
if you think you all will win, the answer is never, never…..

[verse 29: little bear and the big red book]
h+llo there, it’s just me! little bear!
from what’s been done, i don’t think it’s right to stare
i’ll leave you dead in a grave, just like my animators mother
making you commit suicide, and have you dead like mung and chowder!
mordecai and rigby, you can’t fix sh+t, this battle won’t last long
you p+ssies better be scared, when i start to sing my song!
my verse is almost done, so i’ll just give you some time to run
1,2,3… ready or not, here i come!

[verse 30: angelica (the rugrats theory)]
no! my schizophrenia had lead me to think up a stupid bear!
i won’t feel guilty if i hit you, i swear!
you should have never been born, like the devilles abortion
just like my friends, your victory is just imagination
i need more drugs to get me through this fight…
even if i overdose, suzie will still be with me in delight
i know this isn’t the way that i should feel…?
this is just all in my head, none of those babies were real…

[verse 31: sid (lost episodes)]
hi there! name’s sid. welcome to my reality
get your friends out of my garage, angelica, or i’ll give a new meaning to babality
there’s nothing interesting with you, with all your death and rape
mess with me, and i’ll cut you up like my tapes
how can you dare to fight the original freak?
i’m the reason for your existence and why your life is bleak
god bless my father, for the reason for my obsession
so i can learn happiness is a lie, what’s right is depression
just look at what i’ve created, i’m like the water that makes fog
even as going as far to put my parents down like a dog
it’s time to end this, like the end of a song with a clarinet
i’m done with this cr+p, time to unplug the set

[outro]
who won?
who’s next?
you decide!
epic
rap
battles
of
car
toooooooooooooooooooooooooooons

- epic rap battles of cartoons lyrics

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