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epm - lawyers lament lyrics

my keys expertise, hire me you’ll upturn
fat fees? no — i don’t squeeze; make all your concerns scat

ease getting your patents. you don’t have to yearn that
cause i know ip, my record affirms that

they want war? forewarned: i’ve got the confirmed stats
run up the score for you, this is what i earn at

you want patents? you don’t have to yearn that
cause i know ip, my record affirms that

those lawyers that, make a living on catastrophe
say, my kinda laws geeky, well feel free to laugh at me
choose work for your mind, mom preached education

its not money, study! books sitting there waiting
thanks to her, most cases don’t take ’em
ambulances don’t chase ’em, [those] clients not injured most faking
no divorces they’re crazy, criminals shoot me don’t pay me
yet, judges still quote papers i wrote, like: what say me? replay me

companies that hired me became rich, successful
its patents and ip made their corporate chests full

i’m protecting high techno, try to take it, i’ll get you
i aim high, inside pitches, then let go
duck away or take hits, like astros’ great, craig biggio

read your pre-nup;
can’t hit b-lls teed up
adversaries get buried, dig em up, i’ll clean up!
when other lawyers meet, they invite me to speak

[haters] so frightened can’t sleep, far too scared for counting sheep
i’m a bunker buster missile digging deep
i’m seeking out the heat, when the target system beeps, the reaper reaps
i twist up what’s written use it as ammunition
i’ll gut your position or i’ll win by decision
state court or federal i’m head-man
i’ll own you like oprah pull the strings on stedman;
i do deals like i steal, i deserve wine with meals
office at no, no rent, the commutes surreal;
diagnostics or drugs to make sick people heal
i won nearly all patents that i appealed

things, you keep dear while i’m rhyming like shakespeare, i’m taking
solve legal problems channeling sir francis bacon

other lawyers wish they had this kind of career
cause i could patent your mama, make you pay me to see her

- epm lyrics

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