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eric schwartz - children's songs lyrics

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there’s a monster in the toilet and he wants to eat your poo
so you better hurry up because he’d just as soon eat you
he’s coming, he’s coming, here he comes!!!
ahhhhhhh!

there’s a bomb in the bed
and it goes off when it gets wet
pleasant dreams, little girl, pleasant dreams

it hurts your food when you chew it
it hurts your food when you chew it
so next time you eat, think twice, don’t do it
”cause it hurts your food when you chew it

when women get pregnant, strange tricks the lord plays
each of them change in their own special ways
some will crave pickles
some will knit socks
mommy stored lipids like gold at fort knox
if there’s one thing i have found to be true
mommy is fat because mommy had you

mommy drinks because you cry

- eric schwartz lyrics

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