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everything went sideways - shame (that which cannot be undone) lyrics

my social phobias are digging me a deeper pit
though some days may i hate myself, i chose to stay in it
afraid of where i’m going, ashamed of who i’ve been
i regret that this is who i am

my t++th are rotting out my skull, and i’m afraid to smile
dentists freak me out, i haven’t seen one in a while
evading all my issues until the point of pain
i let it sting, though my ears ring, i still sing

i dropped out of high school, tried to stick it to the man
truthfully i should have stayed and hatched a better plan
a lowlife and a deadbeat so i can’t support myself
a poster child wasting useful sp+ce

don’t pity my excuse for a lifе led by mistakes
i’m aware that i am flawеd and the toll that life will take!
i stand as the accused and i plead guilt on every case
this is the fault of my actions and i will endure with all that it takes

when i was born the doc gave me a couple years to live
and with that information, i should’ve done more sh+t with it
though i have overcome this hole born into my heart
i fill the void it left behind with toxins

i never met my father, well at least while he could talk
comatosed for life, from a swerving semi+truck
and when they pulled the plug, though he was finally awake
wanted to murder the three c+nts that made him die
my life feels a train wreck, though sometimes i tend smile
i wonder if my suffering has really been worthwhile
still afraid of where i’m going, okay with where i’ve been
i now accept that this is who i am
f+ck!

- everything went sideways lyrics

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