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feldup - moments of sobriety lyrics

found myself in a hotel room
with a rock inside my throat
in this moment i’m like a kid again
and i can’t find my way home
the drug is wearing off and i need
to pick up my clothes
i’m naked in a stranger’s place
i don’t know how i got there

i can still feel my head
getting light on that july day
this girl got me locked inside her gaze
i want to see her again
but you come out the shower naked
with a smile that splits your face
i don’t feel like saying no
’cause i can tell you enjoy yourself
so i lay down, turn my head and feign pleasure
i see a dark figure in the corner
my body hurts like h+ll i’m petrified with fear
as i feel her closer than she’ll ever be

and i say “slower”
i say “slower”
i say “slower”
and after a minute, she hears me
maybe i wanted to sink that day
to touch the bottom of the ocean
’cause i wanted to swim ’til i was free
and i figured i didn’t need to breathe
i might be still swimming to my death
there’s an anchor attached to my leg
you claimed me as your land
like a dog p+ssing on my face
and i will die but sooner than they think
and i hope it feels just like being a kid
who’s falling asleep in a car piercing through the rain
i don’t want to notice my conscience
fading away
away

and i hope it feels just like being a kid
and i can hear them laugh through the walls
a tender warmth an overwhelming bliss
so soft, i’d happily drift into eternity

i gazed towards the crowd
the sand was pushing on my back
and in the depths of the sky
i saw a face that looked like yours
you were not here but i felt your presence
the ever so soft touch of your hand
far away from all i had ever felt
i wanted to see you again
just like in july
all over again
i wanted to be caught in your gaze
that’s why i kept breathing

- feldup lyrics

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