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feldup - stockholm lyrics

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i failed last night, again
and all my friends are going to sleep
i’m five days past my birthday party
but i never really thought about it

i never realized how stupid it was
it didn’t stop me from drinking
or from creating a tinder account
or from ever matching with anyone

ooooooooh

i still get bad thoughts in the subway
i still think about you everyday
i still think i’m a toxic friend
i still want to see all of them
there is no cure
i am the disease
there is no cure
i am the disease
so now that i’ve blown the candles
i realize i couldn’t handle
their looks and their giggles
pressuring me to pop a bottle

took a look at your place
saw you hid all the mess
to fake that it was clean
you know how messy i can be
i still think you lied to me
comforted me with your fantasies
telling me that one day
we’ll get away
i’m not my parents’ son
i was born in an ocean
an ocean of marketing schemes
that worked on me perfectly

i’m in a car that only accelerates
but i think they removed the brakes

try to find a home in a battlefield
kept under a giant metal shield
try to pay your debts and try to forget
did they actually want us to feel depressed
speeding
speeding
speeding
the train
until my inevitable death

i’m in a car that only accelerates
but i think they removed the brakes

maybe we could have seen colors if we weren’t all colorblind

i gotta feed my kids but when it’ll collapse it won’t matter… really…

sometimes my shoulders feel so heavy, i wanna give up

sometimes stopping the fight’s… + it’s tempting

it took us years to get to this point
we never knew why we wanted it
people have grown up since
i’ve been stuck on my past mistakes
a few little things
some words i shouldn’t have said
or shouldn’t have sung
and shouldn’t have erased

i’m in love with my abusers
isolation is a deadly weapon
i’m in love with my abusers
isolation is a deadly weapon

i woke up one day
i couldn’t walk nor could i stand
my body couldn’t resist
now i think i understand

jerome are you still proud of me ?
jerome are you still proud of me ?
take care of karen please…
take care of karen please…
there is no cure
i am the disease
there is no cure
i am the disease

- feldup lyrics

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