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feral the earthworm - santopia lyrics

[intro monologue]

this song is based on three ideas that i’ve tied together;

i watched my grandma spread my grandpas ashes into the sea
jimi hendrix wrote castles made of sand in 1967
and i once i built a sandcastle
with somebody that i loved dearly
at just twenty i was too young to see it clearly
and probably could’ve never have guessed that in two years we  wouldn’t be an item
but as i thought about that idea fighting  the tears?
my ears nearly combusted
because i trusted  the castle that we constructed
was of an indestructible substance
but that’s dumb since
everything was once just
a formless void
be sure every moments enjoyed
because one day it’s going to slip away
and i’m pretty sure that’s just something
that we in the third dimension just can’t avoid

[first verse]

i’ve written, 26 verses … 696 bars
with each of their multis perfect my stomach finds this is hard
i’m crushed with all types of scars
where the f-ck do i start?
i just witnessed four years of history, literally get ripped apart
maybe with how once upon a time i felt so unworthy of love
i was on the cusp of self destruction
when she cured me with hugs
a lot of my friends got hooked on drugs
i probably could have done that easily
but i consciously chose responsible
so that she would be proud to be with me
because when i was walking next to her?
the sun would never cease to shine
with a reason to believe?
i found so much peace of mind
of the deepest kind
it’s like life was just a tree to climb
but the day she flew away?
i was bluntly confronted with the need to find
all that sh-t on my own
i had to go it alone
and so i roamed …
for six months the open road was my home
if only the amount i’ve grown
could be spoken in poem or shown
i found unit – e when i was thrown to the unknown

[chorus]

if you knew that we
would have to watch it slip away
would you have played in the sand with me?
and built intricately?  i concluded that the answers yes
i used to ask myself constantly

if you knew that we
would have to watch it slip away
would you have played in the sand with me
and built intricately?  i concluded that the answers yes
i used to ask myself constantly

[second verse]

doors open and close
that’s just how it goes
you could stare at the mountains
and you could play a thousand shows
but what you seek at the mountain peak
is peace with the continuum
i wish it was consistent but now i think it’s a pendulum
what if it sways, like the waves? breath, yin and yang
what if it’s  in and out, up and down
or just signals in your brain?
accept what can’t be changed
be the best that you can be
because  peace is found within
and that’s the key to unit – e

[third verse]

i used to be extremely p-ssed. wanted you to feel my pain
felt your methods were evil and on them i would often blame
f-cking everything. can’t say that i felt no salt
i felt you’d found happiness with my soul as your pole vault
i was devastated. couldn’t think. therefore i could barely rap
fans, how you finish your alb-m
when it feels like every days a trap?
but no talks of the bad. i’d rather rap about huntsville
watching monologues of plastic bags
thinking of that’s fun still
but sometimes i tell myself i’d like to forget
then watch eternal sunshine of the spotless mind and felt sick
like sh-t … those thoughts are positive
and i don’t want to let go
but now the house is haunted
and those laughs are just an echo
a m-ffled reverberation of some distant past
when i connected it to the trip i took with gran i just laughed
like wow… you’re right jimi. it all melts into the sea
even if you find your perfect partner eventually he or she
will cease to be. because that’s life right? it’s fleeting
so enjoy it while it lasts and try to smile as it’s receding

[final verse]

dear gran
dearest wanda lee
dearest dopest mother f-cking grandma that there can be
to witness you say goodbye to pops
was such a tremendous honor
it moved me
i’m forever a better man because it offered
unapologetic insight into the depth of human love
i just tried to give you sp-ce because i knew it must be tough
he was your husband of forty years
your best friend. it was perfect
i’ll never question sandcastles again
you’re proof that they’re worth it

[chorus]

if you knew that we
would have to watch it slip away
would you have played in the sand with me?
and built intricately?  i concluded that the answers yes
i used to ask myself constantly

[sample]

it doesn’t really matter that the wind or the water
is going to come along and maybe change it
or have it morph into something else
because the whole enjoyment in a sandcastle
is in the process of making it

- feral the earthworm lyrics

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