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​flea market suicide - a dumb song about a boy i made a playlist for lyrics

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[verse]
don’t wanna wake up, got him in my mind
suicide note, got it all outlined (f+ck)
spending all my money, tryna have a good time
thinking, wondering if i’ll ever make it off rhymes
but i keep thinkin’ of him
i wonder if one day i’ll ever catch a win
starin’, hopin’ that he’ll call me on a whim
i think that my future’s looking pretty grim (ayy)
don’t wanna wake up, got him in my mind
suicide note, got it all outlined
spending all my money, tryna have a good time
thinking, wondering if i’ll ever make it off rhymes
but i keep thinkin’ of him
i wonder if one day i’ll ever catch a win
starin’, hopin’ that he’ll call me on a whim
i think that my future’s looking pretty grim

you know, i um+
i us+ i thought i could be confident
and um i um actually went up to him
and i didn’t know him
um some old friends knew him
but they don’t talk to me anymore
and um i went up and i was like
hey i think you’re pretty
um i’d love to get your contact info
and i didn’t have a phone
so i asked him what social medias he had
and um he has like nothing
and i was like d+mn
well, here’s my email
and then the next day he came up to me
and went oh hey sam
i um made uh i made a discord for you
and um i’d never felt so wanted in that moment
um but he doesnt like me now
we dont he doesnt want to speak to me
and um you know i think ive learned to accept that
but um every once in a while i’ll see him in the halls
or i’ll see him in class and um my heart’ll sink
and um i miss him i miss him a lot
even though we never dated
and we never really got close
it always reminds me of the time that um
i tried my best and i still failed



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