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francis hopkinson - the battle of the kegs lyrics

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gallants attend, and hear a friend
trill forth harmonious ditty;
strange things i’ll tell
which late befell, in philadelphia city
’twas early day, as poets say
just when the sun was rising
a soldier stood on a log of wood
and saw a site surprising

as in a maze, he stood to gaze
the truth can’t be denied, sir
he spied a score + of kegs, or more
come floating down the tide, sir
a sailor too, in jerkin blue
the strange appearance viewing
first d+mned his eyes, in great surprise
then said, some mischief’s brewing

these kegs now hold the rebels bold
pack’d up like pickled herring:
and they’re come down to attack the town
in this new way of ferrying
the soldier flew, the sailor too
and, scared almost to death, sir
wore out their shoes, to spread the news
and ran til out of breath, sir

now up and down throughout the town
most frantic scenes were acted:
and some ran here, and some ran there
like men almost distracted
some fire cried, which some denied
but said the earth had quaked;
and girls and boys, with hideous noise
ran through the town half+naked

sir william he, snug as a flea
lay all this time a+snoring
nor dreamed of harm, as he lay warm
in bed with mrs. loring
now in a fright he starts upright
awaked by such a clatter;
he rubs his eyes and boldly cries
for god’s sake what’s the matter?

at his bedside, he then espied
sir erskine in command, sir
upon one foot he had one boot
and t’other in his hand, sir
arise! arise! sir erskine cries;
the rebels + more’s the pity +
without a boat, are all on float
and ranged before the city

the motley crews, in vessels new
with satan for their guide, sir
packed up in bags or wooden kegs
come driving down the tide, sir
therefore prepare for bl++dy war;
these kegs must all be routed;
or surely we despised shall be
and british courage doubted

the royal band now ready stand
all ranged in dread array, sir
with stomach stout to see it out
and make a bl++dy day, sir
the cannons roar, from shore to shore
the small arms make a rattle:
since wars began i’m sure no man
e’er saw so strange a battle

the fish below swam to and fro
attacked form every quarter;
why sure, thought they, the devil’s to pay
‘mongst folk above the water
these kegs ’tis said, tho’ strongly made
of rebel staves and hoops, sir
could not oppose their powerful foes
the conquering british troops, sir

from morn to night, these men of might
displayed amazing courage;
and when the sun was fairly down
retired to sup their porridge:
an hundred men with each a pen
or more upon my word, sir
it is most true, should be too few
their valor to record sir

such feats did they perform that day
upon these wicked kegs, sir
that years to come, if they get home
they’ll make their boasts and brags, sir

- francis hopkinson lyrics

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