frank zappa & the mothers - scene 87: “penis!” (dialog protection reel) lyrics
your d+ck
your d+ck
your dork
your dork
your pr+ck
your pr+ck
your pork (your pork?)
pork?
who calls it a pork?
these men and the stuff they call a wee+wee
a wee+wee?
you mean a p+n+s, don’t you?
a p+n+s?
p+n+s is such an ugly word
it’s not that ugly, really
sure, i use it all the time
sure, sure, we all say it every once in a while, listen
p+n+s
ew
p+n+s
p+n+s
ew, it sounds so revolting the way you guys say it
ew, ka+ka
ka+ka
a p+n+s can be a very useful organ
yeah, and very exciting too once you get to know me
p+n+s
it sounds so overwhelmingly medicinal
a p+n+s sounds likе something a doctor would have hanging off him
none of thе men i know and love in the rock ‘n roll business got “p+n+ses”
they all got c+cks or d+cks at least
sure, you wanna go strap on a pop star and he wants to stick a “p+n+s” up you, where is that at?
let’s ask our studio audience
will you trade what he has in his pants for what i have behind this curtain?
what is it?
you mean what’s in his pants?
i know what’s in his pants, he’s a lonely guy
(take the money)
you have to choose before the big wheel stops whirling
you, hey buddy, sky marshal, go whirl the big wheel
can i just take the money?
there isn’t any money, just the curtain and
the lonely guy
(take the money)
time is running out
think it over carefully
the curtain
i want the money
wait
what could it be in there?
in his pants?
in the curtain
doesn’t anybody care what’s in my pants?
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