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fred ebb & john kander - roommates lyrics

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[sally, spoken]
well, i mean, if you hadn’t come to the kit kat klub
and been so dreadfully attractive
and recited poetry and whisked me off—

[sally]
i’ve a superb idea
i do get the best ideas
the longer you know me the more you’ll discover
i do get the best ideas

i know what i’ll do, i’ll make a prairie oyster
darling, that’s exactly what you need
nothing is diviner than a prairie oyster
satisfaction fully guaranteed

[sally, spoken]
i practically live on them
it’s just a raw egg whooshed around with some worcestershire sauce
and it’s heaven for a hangover

[cliff, spoken]
i haven’t got a hangover

[sally]
on the morning after take a prairie oyster
suddenly the mind and i are clear
you haven’t any eggs, oh cliff, it’s all too boring
oh, never mind, i’ve got a few in here
[cliff, spoken]
that’s quite a coat

[sally, spoken]
it should be, it cost me all i had
little did i dream how soon i’d be unemployed at the klub

[cliff, spoken]
dear max?

[sally, spoken]
oh, cliff, you’re so divinely understanding, i adore you
i do hope i’m not going to fall madly in love with you
though i believe a woman can’t be a truly great actress
until she’s had several passionate affairs and had her heart broken

[sally]
here you are, my darling, it’s a prairie oyster
sally’s blend of worcestershire and egg
what’s a proper toast on this profound occasion?
i know, “hals+ und beinbruch!”—break a neck and leg!

[sally, spoken]
it’s supposed to prevent it happening
though i doubt that it actually does
[cliff, spoken]
hals+ und beinbruch, sally

[sally, spoken]
oh, cliff, isn’t it perfectly marvelous that we met?
i mean, have you ever come across two people
more ideally suited to one another?
here we are, just the perfect companions, the perfect partners
the perfect roommates–

[cliff, spoken]
roommates?

[sally, spoken]
i mean, if i were allowed to stay
think of it! you could write this fabulous letter back home to wisconsin—

[cliff, spoken]
pennsylvania

[sally, spoken]
pennsylvania, and brag about me

[sally]
dear mother, father, uncle jasper
and everyone else in harristown
[cliff]
harrisburg…

[sally]
harrisburg…
i’ve some wonderful news to tell
i’ve moved to berlin
and took someone in
to live with me
and it’s working incredibly well

my roommate is absolutely dear
i’m seldom aware that she is here
she’s gentle, considerate and kind
a better roommate i couldn’t hope to find

in addition, my roommate is stimulating too
so helpful in everything i do
by telling some stories that she knows
she’s got me writing a better brand of prose

my room is a two by four
but she doesn’t ask more
than one little drawer
(even i can spare that)

yes, one day she magically arrived
since then i’ve blossomed, i’ve positively thrived
why, just last evening i looked about
and i was hard put to figure out
how in this wide world i ever lived without
my roommate

[cliff, spoken]
sally, listen
no matter how sophisticated someone is and how civilized a society is
they just can’t accept a young attractive girl
moving in with a young single man
i mean, it just isn’t done, that’s all

[sally, spoken]
you’re absolutely right, cliff, absolutely, i can’t do it
what i can do is sleep on a bench in the tiergarten or somewhere
goodbye, cliff

[cliff, spoken]
sally…

[cliff]
this room is so cramped and small

[sally]
but think after all
she’s not very tall
and skinny as well

[cliff, spoken]
well, not too skinny

[sally, spoken]
please, may i stay?

[cliff, spoken]
ah, the h+ll with it

[sally, spoken]
oh, cliff

[cliff]
my roommate is absolutely dear

[sally]
you’re absolutely right

[cliff]
i’m seldom aware she’s even here

[sally]
morning, noon and night

[cliff]
she’s gentle, considerate and kind

[sally & cliff]
a better roommate
you / i couldn’t hope to find

[sally]
your nameplate upon the door
was begging for
just six letters more
bradshaw dash bowles

[sally & cliff]
we’re roommates for all the world to see
we’re roommates

[cliff]
miss craziness and me

[sally & cliff]
we’ll tell each neighbor whom it offends
only a d+mned fool misapprehends

[sally]
he’s not my lover

[cliff]
we’re barely even friends

[sally & cliff]
we’re roommates

[sally]
just roommates

[cliff]
just roommates

[sally & cliff]
roommates

- fred ebb john kander lyrics

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