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gavin castleton - fast and loose lyrics

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what a strange twist of fate
to leave my power cable
at the office today
late at night i drove back
there you were on the curb
with your hand on him that way

i watched the two of you get on a bus
and i followed you home
like a misery addict
dry heaving and weaving through traffic
regressin’ and stressin’
my breathin’ erratic

when the truth is disgusting, i feel like i must stare
if i want to move on, it’s the best way to get there

on that day, i began to unravel
i could see all the knots you had tied
i could handle the loss of a friend and a lover
i could weather the shame and the shots to my pride
and i feared for my work reputation
i was scared that my lie would blow up in my face

but what i was most afraid of
was that i’d go back
to being just like you
playing fast and loose
playing fast and loose
with the truth

i worked so hard to get past it
and i swear that you set me back
i don’t ever wanna go back to
the cowardice of youth
the cowardice of youth
the cowardice of my youth

i just couldn’t get it right this time
once again, i had to learn that lesson
yeah, okay, i saw the warning signs
but i was running from a deep depression

and if i really try to pick apart the reasons
that i’d settle for a mistress when i could have found a wife
i focus on the most pathetic notion that just coasting like a coward
meant i wouldn’t really ever have to try

i couldn’t give you my heart so i just tried to fix your life
now the karma’s so thick, i want to cut it with a knife
we’re running our respective patterns into the ground
and now i’m finally climbing up while you just f-cking stay down

see what i am most afraid of
is that i’ll go back
to being just like you
playing fast and loose
playing fast and loose
with the truth

i worked so hard to get past it
and i swear that you set me back
i’ll never wanna go back to
the cowardice of youth
the cowardice of youth
the cowardice of my youth

- gavin castleton lyrics

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