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god doesn't cry (usa) - this place is killing me lyrics

there aren’t enough verses i could write
that would possibly describe
the agony that i am living in
weighted down by a tether tied to my domestic mess
and looked at like an alien when i visibly start to resent

i refuse to listen to your rationales
to treat me like an animal
over traits that i cannot control
i’ve been living like that since i was a kid
you aren’t nuancing your way out of this
you abusive piece of sh+t

give up all your time
trying just to survive
living in fear
(it’s just never enough)

painful sensations consume my body and i’m
left with no description to define them

born of existential insult we walk the road of broken glass
tension burns us out and keeps us stuck here dying sitting on our ass
unable to move, i’m devoured by a m+s+ch+stic wrath
vicariously living it again through the image on a screen, or
beholding the real thing
you spend your life waiting
to find yourself back there again
when you’re in then you’re in
your free will don’t mean sh+t
you won’t ever get out of here alive

not taken seriously
bitterness consumes me
faith in humanity
lost to the narcissist

this place is h+ll

i smell that look in your eyes
it’s guilt and fear in disguise of the patriarch
well i see right through you b+tch
and you can’t stand it
it makes me feel ecstatic
cause you can’t deny it
you like take things at face value when you need it but ignore all method when it fits your narrative
use that as a justified means to verbally assault me and
tell me that’s okay cause you’re here to protect me
well i know you’re so full of sh+t and i’m here to prove it
until i’m out of this
every night i close my eyes i sweat and whine i’m horrified
that i’m gonna die in my sleep
i’m paralyzed in sp+ce and time, spaghettified into perceptual distortion

this place is k!lling me

(stuck here rotting in my skin)
(never enough money to get out)
(so close but too far away)
(such a preventable death)

psychopathic stimulation as a coping mechanism
rock bottom just keeps getting lower
i’m climbing yet only descending

if i’m gonna die, make it happen now or never
i’m either gonna croak right here and now or live forever
i won’t take it anymore this is the year i get out
and find something else to live for than escape from this house
f+ck this sh+t i’m sick of it i’m done muting my voice
not like anything i’ve ever done has ever been my own choice
i’ve been subjected to more than i can take
everyone’s concerned but everyone is fake
so let this record say
that these will be the
final sounds i make until i find myself a home

- god doesnt cry usa lyrics

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