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greencowme - airline (skit) lyrics

+running+
greencowme: out of my way, everybody!
random text+to+speech person: hva er problemet ditt, lille drit? (what’s your problem, little sh+t?)
greencowme: and you, ever heard of english?
lynn c: hey sir, i speak english, how may i help you?
greencowme: yes, i would like one flight to the united states
lynn c: um… aren’t we in the united states right now? you haven’t really explained the plot to me
greencowme: first of all, stop breaking the fourth wall, sencond of all, the plot of this skit is we are at an airport in norway, and you work here. can i just get a flight? d+mn!
lynn c: sir, you cannot say “d+mn” at this airport
greencowme: that other random person just called me a little sh+t and you did nothing about it
lynn c: ma’am, i need you to come here
random text+to+speech person: hva er problemet, herre? (what’s the problem, sir?)
lynn c: yeah, i recieved a complaint that you called this guy a little sh+t, if i hear any more complaints, i’mma have to ask you to leave
random text+to+speech person: beklager, herre, det vil ikke skje igjen (sorry, sir, it won’t happen again)
lynn c: now that that’s out of the way, i need to check your luggage, to make sure you don’t have any weapons, contraband, etcetera
greencowme: go ahead
lynn c: okay, why do you have a blank cd in some jacket?
greencowme: it’s the master copy, i haven’t finished the album yet
lynn c: now i’mma help you by labeling this by stamping it
greencowme: you idiot! now all of them will say that because i have to make copies of that! it’s okay, let me just calm down, i brought this coca+cola just in case something like this happened
athena: um, sir, you can’t bring that on the plane
greencowme: i can’t bring a cd that has no data whatsoever?
athena: wha+ what are you talking about? i mean your drink. no liquids on the plane
greencowme: oh, sorry ma’am, i’ll finish it before i board the plane. also, is this your co+worker?
athena: yes he is. why?
greencowme: he’s giving me a hard time for things i’m pretty sure are fine in my luggage, can you just check my luggage instead of him?i’m pretty sure he isn’t trained to do this
athena: not a problem, sir. it looks like there’s nothing wrong. you can buy your plane ticket now, where are you heading?
greencowme: the united states
athena: here’s your ticket, have a nice day
greencowme: you too!

- greencowme lyrics

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