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gxrcia - tear me apart lyrics

verse
apart of me has run away
the other halfs isolated it’s afraid
divided i’m lost between two different plains
walking around in this state i’m betrayed
we was supposed to be lovers not enemies
all of that envyness turned into jealousy
staring at pics of us you a new ent-ty
how could you leave when you f-cked with me heavily
i wish i knew what the h-ll was to come
i never expected you’d turn to be sc-m
chewed me up spit me out just like i am gum
i’ve turned to these drugs to my pain i’ve succ-mbed
lost in my thoughts i don’t know myself mentally
i’m having problems within levels chemically
i can’t point out myself i don’t know my ident-ty
you murdered me b-tch this sh-ts really a felony
i can’t believe that this feeling is real
why would you do this why’d you break our deal
how could you abandon the times that we shared
along with the feelings that we both conveyed
a shadow of myself is all that remains
wounds that won’t heal is what i have sustained
your love was a drug that i took by mistake
now i’m stuck in this debt that i can’t repay

i’m falling endlessly into the darkness
i’m numb to it all im void look i’m heartless
i’m dead to the world you see my own carc-ss
in need of support i need myself a harness
all of this hurt makes me wanna take flight
i just wanna disappear into the night
taking these pills overdose i just might
mixing that syrup along with my sprite

i’m hidden from the world i am unseeable
undetectable this sh-ts unbelievable
i shouldn’t be present this sh-ts inconceivable
no longer the old me im not retrievable

not everything is what you can perceive
people these days really will just mistreat
so many dont want to see you succeed
others will take to see you incomplete

i’m tired of the fighting
many nights i stayed up crying
inside i feel like i’m dying
i can’t go on i’m through with trying
times i tried to sleep but these nightmares be horrifying
all my demons running rampid
there desires occupying
if you knew what went through my head you’d think i was terrifying
many messages received but the whole text is underlying
i’m dying just to live and yet i’m done with this surviving
i be lying if i said i wanna live there’s no denying

these be the emotions i have
i’ve always been a boy who’s sad
walks alone ima nomad
deja vu i see remnants of the past f-ck i wish i could go back
it’s a struggle for me to cope
where is god when i need hope
i’m bout to end it with this rope
downward spiral i’m sliding down a whole slope im snorting this c0ke
girl you do not know what yo -ss has done
i’ve been loading these bullets inside of this gun
playing russian roulette no this isn’t for fun
i been digging this knife into my own d-mn lung
i know i said some things i didn’t mean
you brought the ugly straight right out of me
now i’m looking at pics and the sh-t that had seemed
what was once a fairytale but now is deceased
look at the damage you caused
now i’m peasant man i am no boss
is this the price that i pay at a low cost
or is this what happens when i lose it all
i don’t know what ima do
you’ve cut me open like this traumas for two
if i die tonight i will not forget you
along with the moments i’m paying atonement for all the hurtful things i had said to you

- gxrcia lyrics

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