handsome failure - sobriety (improv studio test) lyrics
i’ve been drinkin’ a lot again
losin’ track of who i am
and i’ve smokin’ lots of cigarettes
i light another before i put out
the one that’s in my hand
i find myself overcome with regret
eight years flushed down the drain
wasted on f+ckin’ nothin’
but some ego servicin’
i’m gonna shave my head
and dress for a change
dress to feel different
for once
i’m so bored of myself
i’m losin’ my senses
and i’m not sure
what i’m gonna do
i feel constantly nauseous
is it self loathing or malnourishment
i don’t do nothin’
but dissociate in candlelight
while listenin’ to black metal
alonе
when i should be
working artistically
and cleanin’ thе house up
i stay surrounded
empty bottles and cigarette b+tts
copenhagen wintergreen spit cups
and
food wrappers and bags
food wrappers and bags
i feel so cold
as my substance abuse
once again takes hold
of me
i yearn to feel numb
when i’m alone
and i’m alone a lot more than i ever f+ckin’ wanted to be
god, i don’t know where the f+ck that went
sh+t
bro i just lost all my artistic ability
that’s f+ckin’+ i must’ve
f+ck
fu+ i need another beer
f+ck sh+t
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