harvey schmidt - the father of the bride lyrics
[michael]
my daughter is marrying an idiot!
how could she stoop so low?
my daughter is marrying a nincomp–p!
she love him, but even so…
i thought i had taught her what to expect
for someone as fine as she:
a man with some fire, some brains and some tact!
someone, in fact, like me!
my daughter is marrying an idiot!
the stupidest of men
and i wish she were just
my own little girl again!
marriage is a sacrament
which is just a way to say
that a very private thing is done
in a very public way
you stand among your neighbors
like a lamb before the slaughter
and watch some village idiot
take away your daughter
the groom has got a family
that sits around and gapes
and bears a strange resemblance
to anthropoidal apes!
it’s like some sort of nightmare
and the thought that really k!lls:
not only must you suffer
but you have to pay the bills!
my daughter is marrying an idiot
the stupidest of men!
and i wish she were just
my own little girl again!
(agnes begins crying.)
[michael, spoken]
agnes, agnes, dear, are you alright?
[agnes, spoken]
of course i’m alright, this is the happiest day of my life!
[both]
when the kids get married
all of our duties will be done
when the kids get married
we can have some fun
[michael]
all of a sudden
we’ll be free
[agnes]
think how happy
we will be
[both]
i’m glad they’re married now
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