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hot dad - teens and their damn smartphones lyrics

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it seems that something ain’t the same today
the kids are different, no, they ain’t the same
kids today don’t like the same stuff
back in my day we liked different stuff

today’s kids’d rather stay indoors
they don’t help, they don’t do no ch0r-s
loggin’ on, cl!ckin’ pictures in the dark
downloadin’ zip files of linkin park

these modern teens are just a different breed
they’re on their smartphones, it’s all they need
takin’ selfies everywhere they go
holdin’ phones instead of hands with bros

they don’t care about the birds and bees
their favorite birds are mad, and on a screen
today’s kids don’t even get their hair cut
let it grow, ’cause they’re on their phones

today’s kids listen to disco
it’s on their ringtones, yeah, wherever they go
they load an app, it just plays disco tracks
these kids ain’t cl!ckin’ “like” on rock ‘n’ roll

these modern teens are just a different breed
they’re on their smartphones, it’s all they need
takin’ selfies everywhere they go
holdin’ phones instead of hands with bros

kids today are playing xbox
back in my day we had s-x with those
no different for nintendo switch or ps4
we made that love to all consoles

we’d gather ’round and do it on the floor
two of us, sometimes inviting more
lots of lube inside controller ports, yeah
pumpin’ all night, then do it again

back in my day, we had physical rocks
but today’s kids just have digital rocks
can’t throw it, can’t stick it up your -ss
missin’ out on rock stuff with friends

why do kids eat food, it’s so gross
back in my day we made love to food
chips ‘n’ dip ‘n’ cheeseburgers ‘n’ fries
rubbin’ the grease on my crotch and thighs

these modern teens are just a different breed
they’re on their smartphones, it’s all they need
takin’ selfies everywhere they go
holdin’ phones instead of hands with bros

kids today are using seatbelts
growin’ up we’d always save ourselves
drinkin’, drivin’, kissing buddies in the car
makin’ love to the empty beer cans

sometimes a blizzard brought the snowstorms
playin’ outside, p-n-s in icy snow
put my t-st-cl-s in my best friend’s mouth
keepin’ warm, whilst making love

today’s teens aren’t having s-x with
their shoes, just usin’ them to cover their toes
i used to wrap the laces ’round my scr-t-m
giving high-fives to all my chums

these modern teens are just a different breed
they’re on their smartphones, it’s all they need
takin’ selfies everywhere they go
holdin’ phones instead of hands with bros

these modern teens are just a different breed
they’re on their smartphones, it’s all they need
they don’t even have s-x with phones
growing up, we all had s-x with phones

- hot dad lyrics

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