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i was born with two tongues - han lyrics

[풍물놀이]

하나. 둘. 하나. 둘. …

there is a word
한
that squirms trapped behind the vacuum gl-ss of old photographs
한
is the hungry scent of sorrow on the skin of my people
한
is the sound of a tongue plucked out of a young child’s mouth
and my 한
is the muddy face of my unborn children
my 한
is the sound of my crooked foot searching for the footprints of my grandfather
and my 한
has been the resplendent quetzal
crazed plumage of immigrant ident-ty
sweat salted pretzel of second generate mentals
reaching through they own limbs and legs to find they own heads and b-lls
the call of clucking elders
snickering silences of shrines swept aside for churches
and workshirts
and the wail of ancestors waiting to be remembered
their hands
the same translucent yellow of
paper fans
vapor pages of sacred text fluttering earth word
the crumbling book of heaven is my
한
drunk and reeling
the st-tches of its spine peeling away
unread ink vanishing
old names and ways forgotten
and conference contacts gone flaky awol
a snaking pain in my heart is my call to respond to the call and response of old spirits who make ciphers in circles singing

하늘에는 별이 많소 (쾌지나 칭칭나네)
우리는 기슴에 근심도 많소 (쾌지나 칭칭나네)
오늘은 바람도 많이도 불고 (쾌지나 칭칭나네)
이쁜 꽃도 다 떨어지고 (쾌지나 칭칭나네)

강강술래
강강술래

[b-ss improvisation]
stop!
drop!
as a matter of fact
just
stop
i could give a f-ck about dmx
instead
let my tongue flex
let me express my 밥 to the 비빔 boy
get a face full of 침 boy
if you don’t step off my mic with that -ssimilate and distort

김 becomes kim
and 최 becomes choi
and i become the foreigner in a citizen’s employ
i check how the dmz becomes the barbed line that traces the military parameters of my c-i-t-i-z-e-n-ship
this sh-t is connected

not conspiracy
but push and pull theories
word to my man third
science
why we here
we were pushed by conditions
economic and political
now pulled by the glitter of mirages
gold mountain
i’ll bet
if i wait for a culture to embrace me y’all!
…i’ll be left peeling my skin back from the madness of my heart
a-z-am, koreans
i long to call brother and and sister and
but would be friends tend to offend with bullsh-t in they hand
cannot hold my brother up if his manhood must be defended
cannot see my sister’s face if cloudy 눈 can’t be transcended

so to mend it i
wipe her eyes of surgeries and burglaries
by shadow and foundation
ground
can’t be drawn on
and on your skin i see my 한
dancing
and a would be friend reflected
lose the would and gain the be
i speak my peace/piece for hope to weave a culture from confusion
paint my freedom with my bruises on my heart
i start
by speaking peace/piece

to ancestors who’ve returned to the essence
to my moms and reconsidering her lessons
to my wisdom i am myself when i’m in her presence
to future seeds for you i’m hitting conferences having therapeutic sessions
learning how to spell my name and multiply my many blessings

cutting out the brew and pot
getting schooled to mix a lot
by my sister anida
so i can speak to jah, allah, christen myself 하늘님
and stop walking on the rim of my own violence
as i enlist the angels on my 1s and 2s, diffuse the bomb inside my shoes and chest
i speak my piece/peace

[radio sounds: louis armstrong singing “there’s a lot” line from “i’ll never be the same”]

- i was born with two tongues lyrics

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