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icon for hire - hope of morning lyrics

my mind’s a kaleidoscope, it thinks too fast
blurs all the colors ’til i can’t see past
the last mistake, the choice i made
staring in the mirror with myself to blame
sometimes i’m afraid of the thoughts inside
nowhere to hide inside my mind
i’m scared that you’ll compare and i’ll look a lifetime past repair
i second guess myself to death, i re-solicit every step
what if my words are meaningless? what if my heart’s misleading this?
i try to capture every moment as it comes to me
bottle up the memories and let them keep me company

when the hope of morning starts to fade in me
i don’t dare let darkness have its way with me
and the hope of morning makes me worth the fight
i will not be giving in tonight

when i’m old and grey, or thirty, or whatever happens first,
i’ll need you to re-ssure me i didn’t waste a verse
or worse, what if my life’s work is reduced to just myself
like never let you get a word in, while i dissect my mental health
or lack thereof, whatever, there’s too many things to track
i really can’t remember if i’m insane or insomniac
now days, all the kids want crazy, wanna diagnose themselves
trade up made up epidemics, p-ss around prescription pills
but my disorder can’t be cured by a bottle, blade, or dose
self-disgust and selfishness tend to hold me awfully close
but i don’t wanna let you see that, i don’t want my friends to know
self-disgust and selfishness take me everywhere i go

when the hope of morning starts to fade in me
i don’t dare let darkness have its way with me
and the hope of morning makes me worth the fight
i will not be giving in tonight

try as i might to keep it together
why is recovery taking forever
fool the whole world, just until i get better
i’m terrified i’ll be faking forever
on and on i wonder what went wrong inside my head
i don’t have to have the answers, but tonight i wish i did
all the pain i can’t explain away won’t fade
all the the secrets silenced by the shame
don’t make me say it [x7]

when the hope of morning starts to fade in me
i don’t dare let darkness have its way with me
and the hope of morning makes me worth the fight
i will not be giving in tonight

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