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illogic - hate in a puddle lyrics

[illogic]
i hate when it rains, cause in puddles i encounter this guy
unable to give a reb-ttal but swift as the pain flood his eyes
wonderin why he’s a gift with no purpose
a priceless one-of-a-kind piece that’s worthless
grounded with no surface
and when he shows one, it’s of sod
cause inside he fights feelings that he was mistake by god
i see his confusion and self-deception
questions of relevance and intelligence
he holds an illusion of self-acceptance
that he shows to those outside lookin in
he’s outside lookin in to his own life; lookin for strength
to carry on as a p-wn in this chess game of existance
in his mind he wants to go on to the dawn
and leave the stress that came with existance
hopin in death he’ll find life
cause as he lives, he roams the dark, tryin to find light
he’s made his heart so hard, he doesn’t even cry anymore
cause he’s confronted sorrow frequently
his heart’s been broken frequently
it’s like he’s lost some part of him and just haven’t found it yet
so in his search, he’s left with nothin but questions and regret
all he wants to know is how one day, he’s content
and the next day he’s cryin
cause his life isn’t what he thought life meant
he just wants to be happy, with his love and all
but too often i get messages through telepathic calls
he’s askin me through a puddle what more must he endure to continue
but for some reason he knows he most endure to continue

[chorus]
when i walk past puddles, my reflection calls beggin me
to answer his questions about life and his perceptions
and tell him why i hate him so much
and you wonder why i hate him so much?
now when i walk past puddles, my reflection calls beggin me
to answer his questions about life, and his perceptions
and tell him why i hate him so much
d-mn, i wonder why i hate him so much

[illogic]
why did i hate him so much? i wondered, pondered on the question
what in my mind caused me to despise my reflection?
i didn’t know i just knew when i saw him, how i felt
and hated the fact that he had to play with the cards that he was dealt
he’s come in contact with some ill things that can’t be explained
life’s extracted his energy to where the pain can’t be contained
so to me he comes, sheddin tears like skin
intimate with some, only the ones he calls friends

if he even exists, he only exists in pain
it’s like his life is a myth
and he’s been blessed with the gift of shame, i mean
from birth to love he’s been betrayed
he’s an unknown in how to cope with that pain and dissapointment
he’s come to know as he’s grown
he feels he stands alone in this world of puddle images
and he awaits the time for when, time finishes
he tries to elevate thought, but he’s still chillin in the bas-m-nt
awaitin a rebirth of his soul as it fears it’s spiritual placement

[chorus]

[illogic]
god i pray you can give me a purpose or help me find it
cause on this narrow path of self-d-mnation, i can’t find it
is it somethin i need to know, some way i need to grow
to get out of this rut, god give me some self-trust
love is somethin i’m lookin for but i’ve found it, or have i?
i wanna live but can i, or do i have to die to?
i try to, have life but my life seems kinda worthless
as i’m starin at this puddle
god i pray that you can give me a purpose or help me find it
cause on this narrow path of self-d-mnation, i can’t find it
is it somethin i need to know, some way i need to grow
to get out of this rut, god please give me some self-trust
love is somethin i’m lookin for – thought i found it, or have i?
i wanna live but can i, or do i have to die to?
i try to, have life but my life seems kinda worthless
as i’m starin in this puddle

[chorus]

{-music changes-}

[illogic]
i sit alone in dismal silence
peering into the eyes of my reflection
wondering if his thoughts are adjacent to my own
what visions of eerie savagery
are p-ssing if purity lurks in the mind of he who i mirror?
lookin at him i am disgusted
he lacks beauty in all external areas
and internally he seems so confused
perplexed with this conundrum of life
he proceeds to function or cope, lookin at it realistically
esteem he lacks, in all areas of existance
reason unknown
what is the cause of the lack of this self-acceptance?
i mean it seems like he needs constant -ssurance
some type of ritual proof that he’s even worth the oxygen he breathes
a, light that shines upon him
is his living in vein? does he have a purpose?
answer – eternally unknown

- illogic lyrics

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