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infinitoria - silent load lyrics

[verse]
i carry the weight like a shadow on my back
stay tough, stay strong, never crack
they say, “be a man, don’t let ’em see the pain,”
so i bury it deep where the hurt remains
i hear it in whispers, the advice i should take
“open up, let it out, don’t let yourself break.”
but the words catch in my throat, like a knife in the night
i’m choking on pride, keeping tears out of sight

[verse]
every day’s a struggle with this mask i wear
“just get over it, man”—like they even care
i put my heart on the line, laid it bare
only to be left in the cold, gasping for air
they want me to be open, want me to be brave
but then treat my feelings like stones to pave
so i close it back up, like a lock and chain
maybe silence is easier than sharing the pain
[chorus]
so i scream in silence, a silent load
a heavy heart with nowhere to go
they said i should talk, but when i tried
they laughed, they mocked, said my soul had lied
and now i wonder why we hide, to the pain inside
when the world won’t listen to the pain inside

[bridge]
what does it mean to be a man?
to hold it in or let them see who i am?
caught between weakness and strength i pretend
it’s no wonder so many of us reach the end
i’m crying out for someone to care
but no one’s around, no one’s there
so i hold it all in, keep my fears locked tight
praying one day i’ll make it through the night

[chorus]
so i scream in silence, a silent load
a heavy heart with nowhere to go
they said i should talk, but when i tried
they laughed, they mocked, said my soul had lied
and now i wonder why we hide
when the world won’t listen to the pain inside
[outro]
maybe one day they’ll see the cost
all the voices unheard, the lives we’ve lost
till then, i’ll hold it close, take it to my grave
another man broken, who tried to be brave

- infinitoria lyrics

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