inkwater - city lights (feat. tom mcelroy) lyrics
i’ve never felt very close to my heritage
in spite of the documents proving my emanc+p+tion
yeah, there it is, smoking asparagus, coughing hard like a carapace
hip hop a mystery to me all because of my parentage
i feel so despondent because i can tell
it’s the devil who’s deeming my life a miscarriage
it’s so repulsive how i literally have no culture
it’s beyond the pain that you feel like an ulcer
every morning i feel way too wеak to get up out of bed
so just leavе my body to the vultures
i can hear it again – how i’m so f+cking lazy and disappointing
i will never become anything i was meant to be
i don’t deserve it; my heart’s full of greed
i’m a f+cking degenerate, never, ever gon’ be better
and i have no say in this
all my life i’ve been feeling like i’m being played with
too much of a coward to spill my own blood with a blade, b+tch
so, i find my solution in chemicals
flammable, edible, everything short of a tourniquet
turning me into a vegetable, letting go
make me wonder, make, make another way
take me under, take, take me underway
light the fire, light the other match again
take me under, take, take me underway
no permission, i was born like this
worn like this, made it through the storm like this
ego torn like this
tired of n+ggas throwing scorn like
“b+tch, silent hatred is a poor guy’s wish”
i’m trying my best just to increase my discipline
seems like it’s simple, but it’s a mess
i have no f+cking foundation to rest against
tested by my own negligence
it’s so disingenuous of me to think
i could get away with this no consequence
dominant logic responding
i don’t know what’s best for myself in the slightest
but even i know to admit when i’m biased
and words can only do so much
as the darkness in me spreads, i just rely on my crutch
exhale the smoke and try to strike some kind of balance within
as i break down and try to build myself back up in a rush
the pressure was mounting and by all accounts
i could tell that i was in for some sh+t, but i had no intention to quit
dollars i’m counting, the bill is compounding
i feel surrounded by seeds of potential, when what i need is to leave
make me wonder, make, make another way
take me under, take, take me underway
light the fire, light the other match again
take me under, take, take me underway
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