j. sula - discussions in a lobby lyrics
[verse 1]
discussions in the lobby, crying in my head
light surrounding me as i lay in my bed
emaciated even though i’m very fed
when i think about it, i wish i was dead
if i leave this world, where will i even go?
do we even know? driving on the road
got no destination, i’m just upping mileage
pain is my deposit, searching never finding
doing fine until that night
when i tried not to take my life
[verse 2]
people told me growing up
when you’re older, you’ll become
wise man, bеaring gifts
now all we share is rifts
complicated, that’s an undеrstatement
stream of consciousness, i think i’m going crazy
i should’ve known not to go in
should’ve known the past gon’ win
[interlude]
it’s like, it’s not like i haven’t tried, it’s just
nothing ever works, know what i mean?
the image of that alone is just enough to
scar your brain for life
it’s impossible to get rid of
it’s hard, every time i see that
[verse 3]
off the market, please don’t start this
we were doing good, stop it
feel like the help doesn’t help
funny, ’cause i dropped the bomb on myself
i’m just talking, she got bodies
i was off it, keep on walking
overwhelming, over+selfish
i’m sorry if i hurt, but i can’t help it
on my knees, so i can pray
but i’ll be pleased if i passed away
[outro]
like, how do you reconcile that image
that disconnect between
what you thought it was and how it really is
you know? it’s
it really feels impossible, but
i’ll be good
sometime
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