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jae fiend (toucanxan) - close to god lyrics

on this baron road im on
its getting old im lost
fightin these demons got no reason een to hold em off
watch me pour my heart
and go nowhere far
runnin in circles goin further then i go restart
when im alone these thoughts
take hold, jus smoke it off
i been high for so long think my mind is gone
i ain’t got no remorse
think its too late for sorry
nearly dying, that’s the only time i’m close to god

i’m tryna run away, whatever thats gon numb my pain
got clean, i’m still the same, dream bout the things the pills could change
i miss my f+cking mom, i miss all of the better days
when the only sh+t to worry bout was ball gamеs
every day an off day, my mind is all hate
lil boi that lost faith, wan grow up to be scarfacе
i hate my own reflection, i hate my f+cking brain
i ain’t got no connection, to a single f+cking thing
last place long as i’m me, no i could never win
f+ck a trophy, f+ck a chip, i think i’m settling
reached out to god but he ain’t get none of my messages
up for a second then i crash, i’m just a pessimist
tryna save me, who dat
you stayin w me, prove dat
this life move too fast
my time up, lose track
give me one more chance so i could mess it up
lemme make one more stand, maybe i’ll step it up
ain’t got a single plan, like what i’m in this foe
can’t no one understand, what i be feeling doe
can’t no one heal my soul, these demons still control
everything i love the most, i watch em k!ll my hope

- jae fiend toucanxan lyrics

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