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jai jalah - summer sun lyrics

[produced by tylr]

i’ve been feeling
so monotonous
in this world
we’re never anonymous
they see my thoughts
they’re disgusted in me
they’re discussing me
they wanna lock me away
i wanna be far away
they tried to k!ll me, i swear
i write but the words won’t come out
i’m right here but they don’t see me, wow
i think i’m stuck in a tv show
cause the cruel irony, i can see
i tried to iron my face
i tried to take a chemical bullet
they stopped me but they wished they hadn’t
full of self-loathing and hate
i’m boring
i’m broken
a record that keeps on going
a record that keeps showing its cracks
to the world
i’m boring
that’s why they all left
this subject matter’s repet-tive
why can’t you get dressed?
why can’t you get out of that bed?
why can’t you get better?
this sh-t’s all in your head
attention disorder
it’s probably just boredom
then explain the voices
(then explain the voices)
my therapist thinks i’m crazy
my therapist f-cking hates me
she told me to leave
i left
i shouldn’t have
i’m depressed

i sent out a distress call
ufo came
had a strange message
handed me some pot and rolling papers
told me
smoke this
and you’ll get better
then i got better
then i got worse
wrote a song about it
then i lost it
i mean i lost it
i went crazy
my sh-t’s everywhere
why the f-ck you hate me
why the f-ck you love me
my mind is breaking
heart is breaking
can’t take this no more
everyone i love
just wants to go off
and do their own sh-t
someone think of me man
i just want some love, sh-t
(i just want some love, sh-t)
i’m so selfish
i’m so helpless
history will forget me
and everyone will forget me
then they’ll be happy
(f-ck)
i miss him
but man it’s way too stressful
to keep thinking
about it
i sent him a message
he read it
he didn’t reply
story of my f-cking life
way too sad to cry
i think i’m gonna die
(i think i’m gonna die, hey)
yeah

[freestyle]
so, like
i try my best
and everywhere i go, like
i’m too stressed
cause, i don’t know who i am anymore
see
i made a mixtape
didn’t feel great
everything about my life is just so sh-t
right now
i don’t know why i’m gonna fly now
i don’t know how i’m so high now
tryna channel my emotions
so i can be the best
they don’t want me
they gave me some tests
they don’t work
like
i don’t know where i’m going with this
where am i heading
motherf-cker, i just settle with it
this life is so crazy
i think they all hate me
i think that i hate me
but i don’t understand
sometimes i think i’m a split personality
cause one time i’m-
one
one minute i’m depressed
another minute
i’m manic
i don’t even know what i’m doing
i’m like
i tried to listen to illmatic
i didn’t get it
maybe i’m not that smart
i got a headache
maybe i’m not that great
i gotta said it
maybe i just gotta say my truths
maybe i just gotta tell you what i gotta feel
i don’t know who i am if i am not real
i don’t know who i am if i ain’t going real
i don’t even know what i wanna be, real
like
just getting sh-t off my mind
like i know this my time
and i know that i’m right
i don’t want her to be mad
i don’t want her to be mad
of course i’m sad
i miss my dad
my friend will get that
inside joke
and this like headache
i don’t know what i’m saying
i get rosé
like
blasé
wasé
motherf-cker wanna go in like rasé

- jai jalah lyrics

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