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jake palumbo - i'm stalking you on facebook lyrics

[verse 1]

i got a message from a nerdy, silent girl
for i.d. purpose, call her “ms. long island”
19, art student, naughty hipster
in a volkswagen rabbit with her friend’s older sister
answered my craigslist ad for a mistress
photography chick, so she fixed on her pictures
probably don’t know i get a “fix” off her pictures
i know if i can meet her in the flesh, then it’s over
she live a little ways away from my rest stop
and oh yeah, i’m still trying to shake my ex off
send a request cause you’re profile’s private
if you don’t write me back i can still see you smiling…
i get a daily briefing like the bush’s
and thanks to facebook, no more hiding in the bushes
this is the start of a real bad disaster
fire up your mysp-ce & proceed to master…….
uhhh, you know the rest….

[hook]

girl, you’re playing hard-to-get
you’d be mine if we ever met
and every time your status sets
my screen gets caked with gook
i’m stalking you on facebook
i’m stalking you on facebook
i’m stalking you on facebook
i’m stalking you on facebook
yeah yeah yeah yeah…

[verse 2]

it’s so s-xy when you reject me
the internet love me when the females neglect me
i wanna tweet you, but i never follow through
you ain’t following me, but i’m sure following you
twitter me this miss, and riddle me that
pitifully i’ve memorized your personal stats
it’s the little condescending words that burn me the worst
i’m nervous even though you really hit me up first, girl
i’m writing, but you’re not biting
how you not recognize a tennessee t-tan?
so what you’re on my smartphone media card?
is that as bad as me maybe needing keys to your car?
you should have thought before you unlocked the key to my heart
but you’re only into art-f– media sn0bs 🙁
i was gonna take you out, i was even gonna pay for sh-t
but now mysp-ce say you’re “in a relationship????”
f-ck!!! b-tch!!!!

[repeat chorus}

[verse 3]

it’s weird the more i get to know you, the more i abhor you
the more it makes it clear that i really don’t know you
i wanna dial you up but i got nothing to say
but “remember me? we never met, back in the day.”
i just wanna hear your voice…..is that weird?
f-ck, i hit the “send” key when i was looking at your contact
hang up & hope it don’t connect for the callback
oh sh-t – you must have dialed -69
if i don’t have the guts to answer the number
the name on my voice mail will surely blow the cover
i should have known better than to put you in my ‘berry
with a picture of you on board the staten island ferry
i keep thinking “jake man, you’re thinking too much”
my roommate’s like “jake man, you’re drinking too much”
but i can’t go to bed till i least log on
and see if i can live up to the name of this song

[repeat hook]

[outro]

many chicks have caught my eye
you’re the one that blows my mind
i poke you all the time, & it’s my heart you took
if i had my wish come true
i’d be laying next to you
fantasizing about your pics, you tagged me now i’m hooked
i’m stalking you on facebook
i’m stalking you on facebook
i’m stalking you on facebook
i am stalking you on facebook

- jake palumbo lyrics

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