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james corden - drop the mic w/ helen mirren lyrics

mirren: bow down, james. bow down

corden: bow down?

mirren: bow down. kneel, baby, kneel

corden: hey, hey. we’re not at home anymore. i’m the king in this studio. this is gonna be fun. josh, gimme a beat!

[round 1: james corden]
helen is basically an icon in her craft
but hwn i heard she wanted to battle me, all i could do was laugh
back home she’s considered the actress you have to fear
we’re in america now, meryl streep lives here!
you dated liam neeson back in 1982
he left you real quick, he wasn’t taken by you
helen’s so beloved, she’s in her own cl-ss
she played the queen, but now she’s a royal pain in my -ss

corden: right there!

[round 1: helen mirren]
i’m the one you should fear wherever i go
if i’m a pain in your -ss, that leaves a lot of room to grow
you stand out not for games or banter
other shows do comedy, you just pander
you thought you could beat me? sorry, game over
i cooked this beef, his wife and her lover
he’s obsessed with my exes. sorry, james, i’m not single
but you know i taught your little mister to tingle

corden: you said that was strictly between us

mirren: the truth will out

corden: josh, gimme a beat!

[round 2: james corden]
helen was impressive, that’s a real change
played a queen six times, wow, that’s a range
america thinks you’re cl-ssy, but it’s all for show
the accent only sounds smart, trust me, i know
you’re outdated, overrated and i’m tearing you apart
i’ll knock this national treasure outta gosford park.
see, i hit home runs, you should stay on the bench
i’m not playing around like you’re not dame judi dench

mirren: thanks, josh

[round 2: helen mirren]
i’ve played the queen, but also warriors and witches
crime lords and wizards, bosses and b-tches
detectives and wh0r-s, altman to shakespeare
the only role you played is “guy who begged to be here”
poor james corden will never be satisfied
until you find a way to get attention deep-fried
but this battle is fun, i’m glad that you asked
it’s the only bit you didn’t find in jimmy fallon’s trash

corden: wow! alright. okay, let’s go, josh!

[round 3: james corden]
you’re called british royalty, but clearly you’re not
even in hollywood as a queen, meghan markle took your spot
you appeared in last fast & furious without warning
you turned the whole franchise into very slow and boring
it’s a shame in harry potter that you never played a teacher
your role in james bond, wait you weren’t in that either
i’m sorry that i had to be the one to take you down
i just defeated the queen, someone hand me my crown

mirren: off with his head

[round 3: helen mirren]
you f-cked up, james. you desperate tater tot
a woman’s worth isn’t credits or who says she’s hot
boys club bullsh-t, i’m done with that cr-p
you’re welcome for this headline “helen mirren can rap”
compare me to meryl, judi, maggie, but why?
they’re not my compet-tion, they’re my ride or die
see, women are a force to be reckoned with
and i reckon i wrecked you, you’ve been to h-ll and back, b-tch!

- james corden lyrics

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