joe haldeman - the ballad of orbital hubris lyrics
they put a colony in sp-ce, just to save the human race
and they put it in an orbit high and round ‘[high and round]
but the lord’s almighty hand said, “this colony won’t stand!”
and he chuckled as he shoved it to the ground.
[chorus]
and it was sad, lord, sad. it was sad.
it was sad when that colony came down. [in peoria…]
husbands and wives, little children lost their lives.
it was sad when that colony came down.
a professor named o’neill offered us a crazy deal.
for just two-hundred-billion he could place… [he could place]
an eden made of rock in a perfect trojan lock
guaranteed to keep from drifting into sp-ce.
he had drawn up careful plans to spend 200 million grand
to build a spinning donut full of men [full of men]
but someone forgot to say, “those engineers have got to pray!”
“or else jehovah’s gonna want to do ’em in.”
[chorus]
now the bible says your god is a jealous sort of sod
with a careful sense of his prerogatives. [prerogatives]
you put a colony in sp-ce without even sayin’ grace
and you really hit jehovah where he lives.
but they took a million tons of lunar dust and terra’s sons
and put them in an orbit of lagrange. [of lagrange]
(but) said the lord, “this sp-ce is zoned just for vacuum, light, and
stone.”
“they’re gonna wish that they had stayed home on the range.”
so with a cosmic kind of love, god gave that colony a shove
into an orbit tailored to decay. [to decay]
sixteen times it spun around, and then it crashed into the ground.
i’m glad i missed peoria that day!
[chorus]
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