joe hawley - crazy f*** lyrics
are you going to eat that crazy food?
may i please have some of it too?
oh, i hope that it does not give you indigestion
this was once a true fantasy of mine
s— is f—— bonkers
at the farmer’s market
we drove the g– d— jeep
and there’s no place to park it
what the f—? cuss!
check out that lazy dude
with all that crazy food
handing ample samples
out to non-customers!
f—— find that punk
if scheisse ever gets dire
gosh dang! he’s superman!
who the h—‘s his supplier?
rapunzel, rapunzel
let down your spaghetti!
seriously though, he’s packing
chow like confetti
“ready?”
s—! uh…
allspice, amaranth, artichoke, acai
banana, barley, basil, bay leaves, bok choi chai
seitan pot pie, marbled rye
bedhi’d black eyed peas, bing cherries
chioggia beets, hold the meats, gooseberries
cayenne chestnut, chia, coconut, custard
dahlia dates, saffron, dijon mustard (you’re fl-stered!)
durian, curry, kale, kasava
clove, eggplant, flax, demit-sse, kava
garlic, k-mquat, lychee, oca root
jalapeños, garbanzos, starfruit, snakefruit
lavender, lime, karela, kohlrabi
juniper, jak, wakame, wasabi
papaya, papalo, marigold, mango
oregano, sake, lemon, luo han guo
kiwi, catnip, carolina reaper
egusi, icaco, why can’t this be cheaper?
poppies, asparagus, queen anne’s carrots
broccoli, a gac, and that’ll take care of us
you have more?
wherefore dost thou obtain such crazy food
thou crazy f—?
collard greens, b-tter beans, vanilla
pomegranate, pineapple, sarsaparilla
rambutan, dragonfruit, tapioca
atemoya, akebia, rose mocha
amanita muscaria, chive, potatoes
watercress, sprouts, quinoa, tomatoes
parsley, sage, rosemary, wait…
almost seems like this should be illegal
(will these even fit in the vehicle?)
watermelon, marijuana, rhubarb
tamarind, tarragon, turnip, swiss chard
blueberry, caraway, fennel, cacao
boysenberry, c-min, cantaloupe (wow.)
celery, sesame, yam, anise, zinnia
kolas, granolas, marconas, gardenias
lentil, cabbage, vital wheat gluten wiener
ghost pepper, muenster, gewurztraminer
apple, fig, pear, peach
pine, hazel, walnut, beech
spelt, millet, teff, taro
shallot, ginger, maca, farro
yarrow, kalendula, kombu, chlorella
cilantro, pecan, citron, portobella
pumpkin, radish, onion, rice
ginkgo, olive, maple, ice
thyme, strawberry
papaya, cattail, sherry
mulberry, plum, mimosa
argyreia nervosa
cuc-mbers, maypops, shamrocks
what’s with the hemlocks?!
bourbon apricot sour
truffle, samphire flower
squash, zucchini, macaroni, porcini, vermicelli
avocados, pistachios, cinnamon, royal jelly
persimmons, hemp hearts, green goddess
celastrus paniculatus
kombucha and oranges!
cash only? uh, nevermind
[j-panese, reversed]
are you going to eat that disgusting food, really?
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