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joel sieradzan - selfless portion lyrics

[verse 1]
why is life not how i want it, i know patience is the key and
my time’s eventually coming, but i’m just tired of looking up these places to envision i’m there, and like a doctor at end of the day my patience is running out, i’m having doubts, i can’t figure out
the reason i feel like it’s unbelievable now, i used to be so naive with all the sh+t that i said, like i’ma be there real soon, a year later
i’m still here, i sit here staring at thеse pictures of places on
googlе images awaiting teleportation straight to mount gould or blue ridge, la, the palouse, tortugas, the mfa massachusetts
or just any f+cking place that ain’t here, cause i’m starting to lose it
been feeling the blues, searching for definitive clues as to why
i’m feeling clueless like the coming of age film, everything that
i feel’s a figment of my future 7 figure check, the only time i feel happiness, i ain’t even hit it yet, sometimes i doubt it if i ever will
history repeats itself, and last time being this naive cost 20 health
i keep on setting this deadline of time to prove i’m great
but i ain’t even started man why the h+ll do i kid myself?
it’s kinda hard to face reality when you don’t got it
the boulders pile up like the draw 4 with the uno card that
life keeps handing you when you think you about to win
you finally bout to claim victory, now you reaching from the deck
[chorus]
i often question if i’m gonna be alright
am i protected by our father that i pray to every day and night?
does he get mad cause i keep asking for the wealth and fortune?
am i selfish or just helpless asking for a selfless portion?
i often question if i’m gonna be alright
am i protected by our father that i pray to every day and night?
does he get mad cause i keep asking for the wealth and fortune?
am i selfish or just helpless asking for a selfless portion?

[verse 2]
i don’t really think i ask for too much, only thing i ask for’s
cash and puma slash tmc tracksuits, new 1’s, bags from fendi
glasses too umm… stacks of actual vintage michael jackson mags that’s wrapped in newer plastic that the old issue of that had never had until i asked for that to happen, true love, classes with a
j+panese sensei master to teach me how to bash y’all on the track
like it’s kyokushin, full contact and you got smacked into the past
you lose bruh, you cannot come back into it
all i have in life at this moment’s practically music, family too
of course but that just come naturally though and i know they’re
there for me but they don’t got the answers that i’m after, see
i ask nipsey and he gets me actually through it, or i throw on some
em, dre, yella, cube, e, mc ren, play any tune when empty and
i’m better during every spin, what am i feeling now, man
what should i play today, some slow jams? erotic jazz? some lofi mallsoft vaporwave?
i get so lonely in my head, i start to dread thoughts
was booming many years ago back when i was engaging
now it’s closed off and got more vacant spots in here than a
dead mall, dan bell and the proper people could even document
all the sh+t they sees in here: just dreams and memories in here
the power has been outed and vandalists sprayed graffiti here
but make sure to keep an ear out for the roaming demons here
i’m tellin’ ya be careful ‘fore they come and take the peace in here
[chorus]
i often question if i’m gonna be alright
am i protected by our father that i pray to every day and night?
does he get mad cause i keep asking for the wealth and fortune?
am i selfish or just helpless asking for a selfless portion?
i often question if i’m gonna be alright
am i protected by our father that i pray to every day and night?
does he get mad cause i keep asking for the wealth and fortune?
am i selfish or just helpless asking for a selfless portion?

- joel sieradzan lyrics

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