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john anderton - arsehole lyrics

giz a quid yeah daft c-nt that’s right
‘cause i gotta give a quid to my last wife
was a smith with the words in a past life
then i’m spilling ink like a squid in my last life
now i’m sharp as a barb on a cl-ss knife
and i’m blunter than death with a br-ss scythe
pop the lid on your grandmothers hash pipe
are you sure that you’re wiping your grandfathers -ss right
he’s a daft spakka i’m a cr-ss rapper
giz a gr-ss wrapper ’cause i’m cl-ss
and alas i’ve am-ssed amber
but it’s too strong give iz two bongs
it’s been too long like the length of my -ss stabber
giz a quid yeah daft c-nt that’s right
‘cause i’m gonna pull a skid on my dad’s bike
and i’m gonna need a puncture kit because i’m gunning it
i’m loving it i’m good at it but dad be talking sh-te
so i’m gonna punch the kid in the head
i’m gonna punch his other son until he’s good and he’s dead
i’m gonna punch him with the bunch of d-cks i found in his shed
he’s got iz up and i’m fed
i’ve had enough so i said
“you’re an areshole mate do you know that?”
“aye and i don’t care suck a whole nad”
i’m sick of f-cking -rs-holes letting iz down
you thinking that’s cool well i don’t you’re making iz frown
i can’t rely on anybody but mysel’ and my l-ss
and i was gonna mention tony but he’s dead in the bath
didn’t turn up for ‘the tattoo’ so i cut him some slack
but the rope i used to choke the c-nt was tighter than fat
that’s trapped in skinny jeans
tighter than i’m k!lling these syllables
i’m k!lling these imbeciles
i’m filling these villains in
pulling triggers like i’m pulling fingers
i’ll be only finished when my bank is full of figures and i’ve coloured in
everybody’s only funny with blood
and everybody’s got a body with a hole in the b-tt
and that apology was hollow should have swallowed your foot
and with no coffee on a morning i’m a horrible c-nt but

chorus x2

you’re an -rs-hole
if you let iz down on a plan
you’re an -rs-hole
if you’re not down with the man
you’re an -rs-hole
if you divven’t (don’t) do it when you can
you’re an -rs-hole
what
you’re an -rs-hole
yeah

i’m writing these lyrics with the end of a knife
i’m scrawling p-rnographic stories to the end of my life
‘cause i’m appalling stab it all into the head of your wife
to get the ink from the eye socket i’ve got it right
i’m coming quicker than a d-ck in a minge
and this particular hinge is lubed up so i’m sticking it in
i’ve got my billy jeans on and i’m filling these songs
with the sins of three mom’s so you might be my son
she’s not my lover but i’m gonna f-ck her anyway
and anyway on any day i’ve got a gl-ss of henny in the hemi
wait
i thought you said you got rid of that car
aye i did but bought another ’cause i’m ‘bout to be a rap star
and this’n isn’t going through the front of me house
’cause the condition of my missus is monogamy now
’cause we’re in harmony i hardly need apologies now
because i got a b now we’re using honesty wow
the animosity in this city honestly a bit sh-tty
my policy is b-tches need to follow me but get pretty
and i don’t mean the makeup on their faces
i mean their soul make up you fakers should face it

chorus x2

do you wanna know how i make phenomenal lyrics
how i’m hot as a sk!llet how i bomb it and k!ll it
find my wallet and fill it with the dollars and shillings
while i’m talking this sh-t i pack a bong and then hit it that’s it
wake up on a morning, put the coffee through the grinder
one shoe on my foot and now i look to find a
cup because the kitchens a mess i know this isn’t the best
i’m looking underneath the fridge and the rest
and if i find it have a coffee blacker than a crows nose
if i cannot then i’ll have to gan back down to joes joes
say i’m not impressed that they’ve got no aeropress filters
they’re from the amazon prime less than an hour delivered
i’ve got some stickers that are sl!cker than rick
i’ve got a stick in my d-ck
and now i’m shaking it giving ‘em stick
i calm down after a bit i did w-nk and a sh-t
i get to thanking ‘em quick but they do have to admit that
you’re an -rs-hole but i was right
you’re an -rs-hole right john you talk sh-te

- john anderton lyrics

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