john lenin and the funcko pops - rap scientist lyrics
call me a ped but forget the phile
im better than eminem in 8 mile
rhymes so hot they got your uncle arrested
not for a hate crime but because he molested
kanye west loves salmon p+n+s
look at me while im slammin p+n+s
why is it called amen when men is plural
i want to draw a nudie mural
im beginning to feel like a rap devil
k!lled three kids went up a level
always on the grind for thе copper wire
stole your dads monеy now he won’t retire
cardi has a wet ass p+ssy
isnt an ass p+ssy a bussy
she say she carry a strap on her
i should’ve known better
she told me to bend over
oh no
told me dont be a party p++per
b+tch you’re blinder then an asian storm trooper
yeah i bent over now suck my p++per
i was supposed to find gold but instead i found copper
arnold schwarzenegger said get to the chopper
his name is funny because it has schwarz
thats an epic reference to sp+ceball force
i always browse reddit
whats a woman, never met it
we know y’all are p+ssies
caught my homies m+st+rbatin
im 3% black yeah i mean my d+ck
its 10 inches long pickle rick
live in bangkok to bang c+ck
buff guy in movies the dwayne rock
you ain’t gotta be a girl to get these centimeters
like my ex wife i am a cheater
when i was little i was molested more then d+ck grasyon
but it wasn’t by batman now thats not okay son
a post office pipe bomb
109 countries can’t all be wrong
b+tch i want to be sedated
for 9 months i’ve been constipated
lot of people more smart than me
your mom gave me an std
more sea men than men in the sea
dory still can’t find a man better than me
some woman at a wedding wearing a gown
rhymes going down like bobby brown
i got your mom wetter then an emo girls toaster
she rode me and screamed like i was a roller coaster
using c+ck like a tooth brush
when they bust in your mouth its such a rush
measure my p+n+s with a yardstick
gas on it makes it a fart d+ck
my ice like cream like bing chilling
shove it up my ass it will make me sing
cum in my ass make a special soup
drink it out when i p++p
a little salty i can work with it
i add a bit of msg and it fixes it
this song is f+cking bis+xual bro
cum in my ass, color like snow
human centipede you already know
gallon of whey makes my 3rd leg grow
i bet you don’t even understand slovakian traffic cone
go google it on your phone
yeah i ignore women because i’m a sigma
but actually though what the f+ck is ligma
i got big brains i’m smarter then dexter
she ignored you thrice bro don’t even text her
9/11 never forgor +
bush did it thats for sure
fbi knockin on the door
thank god they werent looking for the 52 dead kids on the floor
i’m sly as f+ck smoother then ghirardelli
spread your b+tch like she was jelly
peanut b+tter i nut in her
your ass is looking like a snick snack
i got a stroke from a tic tac
is your mom a sneeze because that b+tch gazoontite
my room glows in the dark when under a black light
i’m destroying j+panese p+ssy like i’m a tsunami
cat can have a little a salami
b+tch im current like electricity
if 2 d+cks fit then why not 3
yeah i’m whiter then a country club
i have three nipples one is a nub
my life was ruined my the me too movement
getting rid of s+xual misconduct is not improvement
saving b+tches like i am a pack rat
your d+ck so thin make’s poor kids look fat
i’ve f+cked more kids then w+lly wonka
i’m h+rnier then a male totonka
i’m slapping b+tches harder then will smith
harnessed that force call me a sith
invalided your mom harder then ukraine
call me the joker baby because i’m insane (in bad joker impressin voice)
i left your mom my cum as a gift
she was stickier then flex seal by phil swift
i’d rather have s+x before marriage then marriage before s+x
saving thousands of dollars making meth with goodrx
goofy gangster with a youtube prankster
hit a fetus with a shoe
bernie madoff was a good banker
abortion clinic trashcan stew
do the dance and do it wrong
intercourse with your dog takes really long
like mario i am stomping on turtles
your b+tch so wet call her a squirtle
im crazy loco like john and yoko
i am more musical then that kid from coco
do you want to bang bang you know what i’m alluding
uwu whats that its my p+n+s protruding
to stay on the grind i wear a diaper +
i lay her down then i pipe her
my p+n+s is huge like that of a t+rex
when girls see it they are under my hex
my p+n+s is huge unlike slim shady
its wide and its white and its inside your lady
call you a gyro cause boy you’re a sheep
5 dollar sneakers your haircut looks cheap
look at your girl those breast are fine
ok but i’m not good at the second line
i got my sperm all up in her egg
king of the creek call me craig
my brains so empty i can’t even think of one rap line
ate your p+ssy that sh+t was devine
i jay walked yeah that’s illegal
my rhymes soar higher then eagles
chloe dancer crown of th+rns
i saw your mother in some p+rn
my bars so exquisite sh+ts like a toast
when i rap against you they call it a pig roast
having s+x without condoms is not consequential
my mommy is nice because she said i am special
i’m so special that they call me ed
on june 27th the queen will be dead
have more flashbacks then peter from family guy
i was in vietnam saw thousands die
at the oscars there was an incident of black on black violence
i’m not allowed to talk about it they threaten me with silence
got slapped silly and i’ve been caught cheating
just stay gold pony boy, it’s not worth eating
tom cruise has stolen millions using scientology
i think it’s time he gives the world an apology
cluck cluck will smith is a cuck
i’m just a duck stuck in the much
i k!lled more people then 9/11
you know i’m hotter then brad pitt in seven
like the eagles in living life in the fast lane
sorry stevie nicks i broke the chain
i eat p+n+s for breakfast lunch and dinner
mama says don’t be a sinner
k!lled more b+tches then k!ll bill
wall street bets said to the moon
i haven’t payed the it’s since mid june
think i got no b+tches you must be crazy
all this weed is making you hazy
i got more game then hasbro or capcom
doesn’t matter what you are i’m a sub and a dom
when i rap pigs come to the slaughter
surprise your wife’s pregnant we’re having a daughter
top15z is just a sub botter
that twink over there named daily logic
got that bbc daily it’s so erotic
that b+tch named ray she’s h+lla g+y
heard 5 bucks can get you a day
your moms cheeks dude they are clappin
but i heard they’re plastic so i guess she’s cappin
yeah but i’m eating more plastic then a sea turtle
so much cum on your mom it started to curdle
your mom yeah she’s h+lla freaky
she’s doesn’t mind when i want a peeky
my d+ck is huge bigger then a gravoid
i’m the next major extinction yeah i’m an asteroid
you came to the slaughtering like a cattle
skidattle
with my rap i show no remorse
heres another epic reference to sp+ceball force
i’m the white eminem baby
dailys got that cake
i bet that bussy ache
tops is such a thot
you know he uses sub bot
look at this dude, always getting banned
no wonder cuz he always typin with one hand
good for me now i have free loob
f+ck your p++py ass and suck your b00b
the mundane men yeah our songs are so lyrical
people think we’re jesus because we keep making a miracle
the mundane men yeah our songs are so lyrical
people think we’re jesus because we keep making a miracle
jerked off to an anime girl i read in mangas
went to a restaurant and eating chimichangas
but i had some lettuce and got montezuma’s revenge
you know that sh+t is cringe
im in spain but without the p
im crazy as h+ll dont mess with me
its worse then that im in brazil
k!lled 200 people in 10 months im out of jail
stuck my d+ck in a vacuum cleaner
i’m a professional ass eater
they call me the cookie monster
i eat it up like a lobster
like i do with bobster
and you’re next up on the roster
top gets no top
only thing he gets is pulled over by a cop
he ain’t got the privilege he has to stop
shoot him dead he plop
i take an image everyone says crop?
go’s viral sike its a flop
dead as your career you’ll be slop
your girlfriend yeah she’s freaky
she’s always so leaky
she’s an animal in bed
like that bear named ted
mundane men
transforming like ben 10
making a comeback like talking ben
you’re the barbie i’m the ken
peanut b+tter hole i would still smash
peanut b+tter hole is what they call your momma when she got no cash
i be making bread you b+tches be loafing
if i see your face outside i’ll be roping
call my girl an xbox the way i had s+x with her
call your girl a pay station she costs money she has more s+x that a rutting bunny
running a bakery this cash isn’t joking
you take your loss its your pack ill be smoking
you females be b+tches you b+tches be wh0res making me paranoid locking my doors
i met my ex, i knew it for sure, she won’t stop staring, it is me she’ll adore
as soon as i left her she was tryna see some gore laying my organs all about the floor.. (now what’d she do that for?) yeah b+tch we dropping the lore
senior citizens giving handjobs call that meat dry rub
english was never my subject, going to age 33 still think a verb is an object
if women arent objects then why are they nouns clash royale gamer i got three crowns
acne covered c+ck that sh+t already lubricated
my bussy pocket ran out of storage need a new place to store my porridge
im so hungry i could eat a horse
sending nudes in codes of morse
watered down seamen call it sea the are demons living inside of me
if you be my dixie chicken i’ll be your tennessee hen i am doing sounding with a ballpoint pen
making all this paper like im a printer
they tried to get me for counterfeiting
but im sneakier than a dwarfism splinter
bleached b+lls look like beach b+lls
i have small d+ck like ben shapiro his wife got that dap b+tch dry like cheerios
b+tch im flailing call me medieval im stunting these hoes like im evel knievel]
return back to castle bro its not a hassle the road is dirt would you rather it be gravel anyways heres the ball stretching machine]
this girl is on fire
i set her ablaze because she is a witch
learned all my english from playing wordle my d+ck is greener than a ninja turtle
i got herpes on my mind and on my d+ck just one sniff of it will make you sick
rolling like a stoner in my pants a stiffy ass b+n+r doesnt take much to start me up i just watched 2 girls 1 cup
lack of hoes call you 3rd whorld
[
i produce d+ck cheese like i’m swiss got some bad dragon for christmas
you look more silly than a dog in a dress
youre less asian than panda express
i got more lights than a festival
my bank is big like my t+st+cl+s
im the thanos of kidney stones
on a gauntlet of pain
tickle my b+lls call me elmo
im an e gangster ill take your venmo
got a bl+wj+b from a mcdonald’s worker call that sh+t a mcslurpy
shat so hard i dodged taxes
take of my shirt when i’m doing maxes
i get more head than the french revolution
like the second tower this beat is dropping hard i’m in tilted towers and baby i’m dropping farts
my mom says i am a fart fig newton i’m so stinky with the farts i’m tootin
bought a 4k monitor to watch more p+rn
i spend my days beating my wife and harvesting corn
i shoved a tv remote up hers im changing channels with my p+n+s
i use my foreskin to store more slurpee
like a dumb balloon animal it looks kinda durpy
b+lls so big i had to get a bra
have to pay to carry them on it’s the law
im planting seeds
i’m not talking about the one that involves weeds
eating infant skulls like its p+ssy
pressing soft spots till they mushy
reeboting the show naked and afraid
its just me in my bas+m+nt getting rightfully laid
call me tom brady because my b+lls are deflated
we had foot s+x then we mated
lot of violence and crime makes me want to die b+tch
if i put my sausage in her p+ssy is it considered a sandwich
shoving pebbles in my c+ck
pebbles are little rocks
my d+ck got that cheedar chizz
b+lls hairier than ms frizz
what the c+ck
i nut inside my sock
1×4 they call me the door
d+ck so big my p+n+s stay sore
kid named finger cause i love to finger paint
purer than jesus call me a saint
sitting in the sun like a f+cking crane
in my pants i came
you need a pot to cup my b+lls
i got a 44 magnum in my pants
not my wiener i just shatted my pants
your rhymes are sh+ttier than diarrhea
i gave your mom gonorrhea
your rhymes are sh+tter then my pants
did i mention that i shat my pants
what’s that smell i think he shatted
dan zace couldn’t shut the f+ck up so he ratted
you got the brains of george and the physique of lenny
(counts on fingers) b+tches ive f+cked (holds up hands to 0) this many
let me go on like a blister in the sun
you should move on she got blisters on her tongue
like a monitor i shine bright
i constrict her in the night
2 inches is honestly way to much
1 inch honestly that’s a bunch
serve that sh+t on a dish
make sure its fine china
thats what i call your mom except at night she a nice whina
(the mom is asian)+adlibs
when i asked for head i didn’t mean like this
this is just the cranium of a decapitaded fish
i’ve got a big mac and i can milkshake too
i call it the sundae special and i made it just for you
im not short im just stubby
i get f+cked without cuckhold hubby
like a choord im plugged in
likea chord you have to finger me to win
moron the news later that moron was you
not because you are famous but because your a monkey in a zoo
got a circumsision from my ex girlfriend
i guess you can say she used too mcuh t++th in the end
its hard to find a friend cuz i like my friends hard
leave you some s+m+n cuz its my calling card
never got the battlepass only battlesmash for me
like a man thats french im getting the weewee
i’m so white i say it like tortilla
had a kid with a latina call him white bean vanilla
this line is just straight up competitive racism
went towards the light but it was the fires of h+ll
lots of covered clothing and i couldn’t stand the smell
girl use too much t++th she is head banned
because she pulls back my hair it’s very grand
i’m like a genie but my lamp is my c+ck
rub it 3 times and i’m hard as a rock
like a manors you know i’m lit as f+ck
call my c+ck mack cause it’s huge like a truck
im not afraid of commitment i commit lots of crimes
rapping too hard then just omit the rhymes
i’ve got a henchman and i’ve got a wench man guess which ones a girl and which ones a man
filmed naked and afraid out on the street
document of chicagans when i show them my meat
crips vs bloods i am crippled and bl++dy
in the streets they call me r+t+rded money
you gotta help me the cops all over
for having s+x with monkeys in a land rover
lucky to get aids like a 4 leaf clover
pulled it out of park and drove down the highway
one of the chimps grabbed me and knocked my eye sideway
ive got more bars than r kelly has s+x convictions
i stole your grandmas tv to fund my crack addiction
listening to youngboy on spotify
with the police i can’t comply
i see more fire than a smoke detector
nike sweatshop im the shoe collector
hitting children with my bullet strays
when is home alone 3 coming to blue ray
you’re more useless then a panda
you know my p+n+s couldn’t get much granda
smother babies they dont make a sound
3 years after pregnancy and your mother still round
grand prix winner so call me a racist
some explain to me what based is
funny guys on internet full of hate
bros like these make me contemplate
rolling like a stoner
in my pants a stiffy ass b+n+r
doesnt take much to start me up
i just watched 2 girls 1 cup
i eat more food than guy fieri
im taking d+ck from guys named larry
i like diary
named my kid gary
his ass is very hairy
it makes me very weary
twisted neck bl+wj+b call me an owl
dont stop the cap cause i wanna fap
then take a nap in your mothers lap
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