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john mulaney - plain plate of noodles lyrics

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[boy, sack lunch bunch, together]
i hate to make a scene at a restaurant
but there’s only one meal that i ever want
just noodles with b-tter and not too much
and they have to be the tube kind or i won’t touch
we were once on a cruise and the waiters got to know me
before my family ordered, they would bring me macaroni
a plain plate of noodles with a little bit of b-tter
but life in a cruise ship, it’s a boo without a rudder, yeah
plain plate of noodles with a little bit of b-tter
it’s the only thing i’ll eat
i’ve tried takin’ chicken and lots of different fishes
but i just want my noodles even though they’re not nutritious
they say be myself and live the life i want
except when i want noodles at a fancy restaurant
i know that i’m not normal, i feel alone and lonely
i’m the only living boy who just wants macaroni
i just want macaroni
just a plain plate of noodles with a little bit of b-tter
’cause i tried every food and haven’t liked another
plain plate of noodles with a little bit of b-tter is the only thing i’ll eat
and on my wedding day while my bride is eatin’ lobster
will i still be saying, “can i please have some pasta?”
a plain plate of noodles with a little bit of b-tter
i’ve tried every food and i haven’t liked another
a plain plate of noodles with a little bit of b-tter
it’s the only thing i’ll eat
just a plain plate of noodles
a plain plate of noodles
a plain plate of noodles
a plain plate of noodles
a plain plate of noodles with a little bit of b-tter
a plain plate of noodles with a little bit of b-tter
a plain plate of noodles with a little bit of b-tter
’cause i’ve tried every food
he’s tried every food
lord, i’ve tried every food
he’s tried every food
and i haven’t liked another
it’s the only thing i’ll eat



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