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john valby - favorite things lyrics

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bl+w j+bs and hand jobs and eating cl+toris
watching your grandmother douche with lavoris
brown pubic hairs on toilet bowl rings
these are a few of my favorite things

serving bird droppings as warm appetizers
l!cking the residue from bathroom sanitizers
sanding the top of my d+ck ’til it stings
these are a few of my favorite things

probing my d+ck+hole with sharpened lead pencils
enlargening my assh0l+ with kitchen utensils
knowing the joy that an egg beater brings
these are a few of my favorite things

when the dog bites
when the bee stings
when i’m feeling sad
i tell everybody i know to eat sh+t
and p++p on my presents
and then i don’t feel, i don’t feel bad at all
you f+cking scumbag, f+cking christmas sh+tbird
f+ck you!

- john valby lyrics

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