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johnny tra$h - prodigal lyrics

they say its hip to be square, razor+sharp on every corner
e+40 reminds me it all comes down to my choices
coin flippin’ and sippin’ while i figure out the meaning
of these topics and options that reoccur when i’m dreaming
she’s on three days of sleep
i’m three without, catchin’ heat
sweat it out, saw the signs, reunite just to see
lesson in communication, and then what?
good behavior, time off
cashin’ checks into child support payment
i was dopin’ and drownin’ all my sorrows in liquor
no real answer for my anger, but my choices the reason
through some laps around the planet, drifted through purgatory
fear and loathing in a strange & most peculiar story:
a life surrounded with bottles, plastic bags full of powder
microphones, six strings, i’d k!ll my pain, get empowered

moving forward, the mission, while b.r. crushed me to pieces
lined my pockets with money, lined my bed up with women
moving work on three wishes, bags of dope and prescriptions
but every time that i come home, my friends were drunk in my kitchen
hopin’ and wishin’ for a second to get a grip
the pain and the pressure that led to all these addictions
21 to 24, just ballin’ and trippin’
by 26, heavy drugs & alcoholism
27, bathroom, bleedin’ pain out my system
poppin’ vitamins to make a body think it was livin’
kick the bucket, it’s worthless, sick and tired and exhausted
cashin’ chips to pay the piper, then i finally lost it
signed the check on bad habits, tolerance, and white rabbits
combine me with some chemicals: the roof, i’m a savage
then n0body can stand me, so i’d retreat + get reminded
that i’m neurotic, and i should keep my ego off+topic
should i head back to the tropics or bring it up to the mountains?
keep it real independent? hit the road, or just stop?
couldn’t get off the dope, mind straight buzzin’ and blitzin’
confessin’ sins from detox to rehab, now a victim, of the
clinic’s imprisonment, emotions, and visions
i’d hear messages resurrect, reflect and make mention
time went on and my religion became release from partitions
of my failures, shortcomings, flaws, and addictions
prodigal son, at home i finally witnessed
my two sons together, call each other ‘brother’ at christmas
seeing lessons and reasons, i wonder if they are listening
all the patterns and happenings in my moments of weakness
there’s clearly somethin’ bigger than just my intuition
everything i’ve found leads to divine intervention
i’ll probably never understand and i don’t even deserve it
weeped & wondered in the depths of binges why i’ve been chosen
but if through all this i cope, breathe in silence and hope
another message might appear then even strangers would know
down on some paper, let it go, releasin’ pain as good energy
to a song that can vibe, let my people get into it
just a servant with no reason but to rhyme in this way
in my purpose i find peace; in my peace i find grace

- johnny trah lyrics

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